This Is What I Miss

I miss the many days in the past

When I would trip and hobble in the alleys of life
Without being scared of black cats and stray dogs

When laughter was still laughter and the blemish of lips had not been birthed

When oysters still lived on the land and we all played with seashells

And would jump about in oblivion and unlimited bliss

And walking on the beach that was life was such a clueless task

For the moon strolled clumsily in the night, and the sun called in the day beautifully

And I would wake up and care less about the next day…

I miss the days of being young, young and a child

When candy still cost a penny, and I wore Reeboks, yes, my tiny Reeboks

I miss my favourite shorts – I still remember them – all green and sundry

Shorts that I wore and imagined that I was in the marine

And we would play hide-and-seek with “guns” and get tired and run home for lunch

I miss wearing my favourite T-shirt – I still remember it – stripped and all

And my mom yelling at me for wearing these three in a row

And hiding them, and me getting them, and me wearing them again, until they tore…

I miss wonder, and mystery, and rolls of thunder in the rainy season

I miss thinking that the clouds in the coming storm were an indication of the  end of the world

I miss staring at those clouds, scared, but being held by hand by my dad

And him telling me, “Come on, it is just the rains, senior…”

I miss that nickname too (Senior)

I miss walking to church with my siblings, hand in hand

While at the back of my mind knowing that I am all worriless and safe

I miss the stories we told, the nicknames we gave people, the sunny days and the rainy ones

I miss our family stories that no one could understand but only us

I miss having pride in the fact that we had nicknames for all our family friends…

I miss missing my mom and we waiting into the depths of the night,

Waiting with my siblings for her to come back home – with stuff from the other country

I miss crying out to her, telling her I missed her

I miss the feeling of hearing her voice, and the tenderness, and the shoots of peace

I miss so many things…

I miss the jokes we made about everything

I miss the strolls of my teenage days – with my sisters

Damn, I miss those memories, and the taste of a laughing family

I miss those days when they would tell me nothing of their kids and husbands as they do today

When all we could do is cook, eat, listen to music and call it a day

I miss their old selves when they were still who they were

I miss their innocence and lack of busyness

I miss our little fights, and the lovehatric moments, and laughter

O, how I miss those days!

I miss the days of lilies, lilies in their frailty

And smiles that were not forced, and sincerity and that was not charmed

The days when fires brought warmth and not froth nor pain

And colors were defined in the lives of men because such lives were not practiced,

And life-skies that were neither gloomy nor disturbed,

I miss the tranquil life and the way time hovered around us so beautifully

And how everybody cared, and how everyone felt cared for…

But I never wish that they would come back

I never wish that the tiniest of those sweet moments would resurrect

I only wish that I would create more, that God would create more for us

And teach us to number our days

And to enjoy the now, and the then He gives us -

To enjoy it so much that we’ll write about it when we are old enough to write about such things…

I do love the memories, but my present is not buried in them

And now all I miss is a people who know that today is more of a gift than yesterday

And that we can only make a better tomorrow today…

Yes, for now, this is what I miss.

Bonface Morris.