Ambitions, Aspirations and Wannabeism

"Dad, I want to be a pilot!"

Dad stares at the kid, does a mind-scan and instead of being the dream killer he almost was becoming, says, "Yeah Junior, you're gonna (drive?) the biggest aeroplane on earth!"

Kid smiles back, and goes out to play... Dad remains wondering at how many times he has heard that and always – more or less always - failure hits back at his face with a bang...
On some beaten path somewhere, a daughter with a pink ribbon and a ‘flower’ in her hair, with beautiful bright eyes and with deep dimples smiles at her mother. Her mother tenderly looks back at her and asks inquisitively, "What is it!?" The daughter chimes her lips, and hiding the smile a little, while brittling it with a bit more of enthusiasm in her voice replies, "Mom, [pause], you know um gonna be a great woman one day. And mom, when that time comes, I want to drive a big car; then um wanna [imitating one of her TV show ‘role models’] build you a berra-place-of-stayn with dad, then um gonna get married to a man I love, [pauses again], and give birth to (bouncing?) babies..."

Her mom intensely looks at her with shovelled tenderness, holds her hand, and goes something like, "You know my daughter, life is a long journey in which God is the main determining factor... We are only stewards of what He lends us... may it be as you pray..." And they continue with their journey to wereva... The ‘now’ life has to go on, right?

Realistically, children have a way with wanting ‘futures’ and parents have a way with wishing them on... Two goals in life that intercept at a place called HOPE... Yeah, two dreams in life edging at a place called HOPE... and that is why any parent willing to give an answer on parenthood will tell you, “Parenthood is an oxymoron which only those in it can define the edges therein...”

Parents are small gods, with the ability to see things in a different way... Parents have witnessed the rise and fall of their children's dreams - one day they really are gonna be one thing, and the next day, oooooops! All is down. Pathetic. Parenthood is an oxymoron. Really.  
I don’t remember dreaming of being anything at all “when I grow big” during the days of my childhood. Call me whatever you may, but I am just telling you the truth.

I don’t remember - in the slightest way – me day-dreaming as most kids do today, of one life or another when I grow up. Nope. Maybe I was one lousy fellow who worried more of ‘today’ than of what tomorrow was beholding for me then. Maybe I just wanted to be something I didn’t really know. Maybe I was less interested in being anything at all. I don’t know. Do I have to anyway?

But I still remember, when I was 8 years old, my dad telling a neighbour of ours how I was gonna be a journalist. To say the truth, that sounded cryptic. A journalist? It was a joke to me. I lived wondering what journalism was all about, and why my dad – of all people – had to think that I was fit for such a career. I ‘researched’ (I was 8 years old my friend) and all I came up with was that journalism was all about newspapers, radio, TV... bla bla bla... it sounded like uphill punkiness to me then.

I am not trying to make journalism a lesser career, but that it just didn’t fit in my mind. In fact I think I can do better in journalism than in Science and IT.

My dad (and later within that age bracket, my primary school head teacher) thought that because I was a good ‘reader’, and that I ‘read every little thing I set my eyes on’, it was good enough to make me a ‘news dude’... Maybe they were wrong. Maybe they were not...

In High School, I had several life markers to give me the direction for my career choice, but I still never came up with a good reason to believe in one particular career. Maybe I never had good mentors to point me towards my goal and passion, or it may just be because I never gave it a deep thought – a teenager cares less about the future and he/she would rather die in the present than live in (or imagining) the future. So because I was one, becoming ‘anything’ did it for me.

With a tiny and short stature, I was prone to being ridiculed and left knowing that I could not fit in any career, anywhere in this nation. I thank God that I didn’t have a low self image/esteem even with my sopranoish voice while joining High School... I thank Him that although I didn’t have the urge to become ‘anything’ career wise or generally in life, I somehow had a blurred vision of what HOPE could bring me by... So High School went... And now here I am talking to you about how much you think of your goals, your ambitions and your future. Here I am inspiring you to make the ‘you’ you want for ‘you’ and others. The ‘me’ who knew not what I wanted to become now wants to get you tuned in to your goals... I never had the opportunity to get ‘informed’ by someone (or anyone), but because you have it, I request that you utilize your opportunities well...

Listen...

Everyone of us has potential. We all have the potential to become anything we want to be in life. Anything my friend.  I know it. Everyone has potential to Make it or Make It as Jimmy Gait puts it. Let me help you understand some few things that can help you (and me) Make it or Make it...

Fact Number One – If you can see where you are going, then you are halfway there

Because I could not see where I was going, it made my life harder – searching all over until I now have my feet somewhere in my twenties is not impressive. I was not goal oriented, so I lost a lot of time wandering on the basis of nothing.

A man (and woman) who sees clearly (and we need to do exactly that) obtains courage and might to get to where they are going. Seeing the fruition of your ambition makes you strong enough to bind yourself to it even when all else is not working. Are you gonna be a good friend/husband/wife? See yourself as one, then you’re gonna be one... That is it!

Fact Number Two - God has given us equal chances and opportunities in life

Ecclesiastes 9:11 says, “I have seen something else under the sun: The race is not to the swift or the battle to the strong, nor does food come to the wise or wealth to the brilliant or favor to the learned;

but time and chance happen to them all...” According to God (or if you like, God et al), we need nothing more in order to become all we dream of... Success is not limited to a few. Success before God, is the language and right of all. He has given it all to us: 2 Peter 1:3 says, “His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness...” We may love making excuses about where we came/come from, the ‘links’ we have with influential people, and all that yada yada, but TRUTH has it that we have all we need (by the glory, strength and power of God) in order to prosper. We can make it, and still make it, no matter what...! God’s got it in us!

Fact Number Three – We can’t become what we want to be (or what we are meant to become) unless we believe

Faith in self and faith in God are great driving forces for our goals to become true; or else we will die with ‘goals’ that never became a reality. And that is sad. We will become the tenant in the Bible who hid his talents and waited for his master to come back – never putting them to action or trade – and you know what happened to him... So, are you ‘a make it or make it’ person or a ‘wannabe’? Do you believe in yourself? Do you believe in God?

What fails most of us is the strong urge to become what other people are. We are more of ‘cut-and-paste’ people than we are creative. Imitating our role models is a good thing, but overdoing it makes us lose the sweetness in being your own brand. Fact is that whenever we fear being our own brands, our purpose on earth is tarnished and our ability to accomplish what we were designed for by God dies with us... and stops us from making a difference in the world we live in today...

Fact Number Four - Don’t aspire to become a ‘wannabe’

Don’t be a worshipper of others’ ideas; try to create your own.

Don’t be a shadow of others’ way of doing things; become yourself.

You may not change some parts of your week-to-week interactions with people or community, but aspire to do something different somewhere. Start becoming ‘you’. It may not be easy, but it is always worth it... You will attract more admiration from people by being yourself. So just be yourself because that is who you are and should be!

Fact Number Five – You need people along the way

A partner will need his/her fiancé. He/she will need support and encouragement.

A wife will need her husband and vice versa. A child will need his/her parent/guardian.

A Christian will need brethren. A pastor will need his congregation and leaders.

A student will need his teacher and a teacher his/her students. An employee will need his boss and colleagues. A leader will need his subordinates, and those subordinated will need one another. A businessman will need his/her clients and/or partners. A musician will need his/her team and the team will need each other's contribution. All of us will need family. All of us will someone or some people around us. You will need the right people to link up with. Remember that old saying that ‘birds of the same feather flop together?’, yeah, you need people with the same mind and ideas as your own around you – God will bring them along your way, so use your opportunities well...

You should always know that you can never succeed without people – both critics and your cheering squad. They matter in making the ‘you’ you want to become... Also remember that we are social beings who can only THRIVE in a community (as Pastor Lindah [Mavuno Church] puts it).

As you put the above facts into consideration, say this with me...

I wanna be all things I can be

I wanna be all that God created me to be

I wanna be more than what I wanna be

I wanna be nobility

I wanna be a brand of newness and quality

I wanna walk around, and sing around

Talk around, and pray around

I wanna be one and many things to men

And all that I wanna be before God...

I wanna be because God’s gonna make me be...

God bless you.

Go out there and MAKE IT or MAKE IT my friend!

Morris.

“Come We Stay” - A Poem

This is a supposed love poem of a Kenyan lover to his beloved...

Come baby, come we stay,

Come lay my eggs and I will brood over them,

I am unsure if our relationship makes sense, yeah, any sense

And I am afraid that it may jump out and over the fence

But let’s give this relationship a chance of trial and error

And maybe it will hatch into chicks maybe into vipers...

But anyway, come baby, come we stay;

I needed some free stuff, you know

I wanted to pretend that I am committed to you, you know

But how could I unless I cheated you into ‘marrying’ me for sure?

How could I unless I got you hooked, huh?

So I beg you to understand, to understand that I am using you as my experimental material,

Because even our national leaders in this land do understand and approve of my schemes

So baby, o my baby, come we stay...

Come baby, come we stay

Although I am not sure that we are meant for each other

And may never be sure of our truly loving each other

And I daily doubt about ‘if we are meant for each other’

Come baby, my darling; come let me pamper you for a while

An after I am bored; just after I am bored of you

We can have our separate ways...

Yeah, come baby, come let us give it a try, come we stay...

Come baby, even though I don’t want to publicly announce my fears,

Let’s take up this chance before our national leaders change their minds

It may be our only chance of justified stolen freedom

Our only chance to make our sins legitimate before man

Although this stain will stay seen in God’s eyes,

Baby, I know we can later amend our ways with Him...

So come baby, come we stay...

You don’t mind staying, do you?

One night stand, two nights out, three or four, huh?

I promise I will never break your heart, but if I do, it will be in a civilized way

I promise nothing but heaven for the next few days

I promise only before you, so that if you may later develop the appetite of taking me to court,

Or wherever they DO take guys like me,

I will deny saying such things – although I will ensure that baby, I do it with swagga in order to hurt you less

So please baby, come, come we stay...

Come we stay my darling,

And after we are tired of each other, we can part ways

And you can go get another to stay with,

And I can go get another one to ‘fall in love’ with

But for now,

Come baby, come we stay...

Thank you for Understanding...

Your Love...

Typical Kenyan Dude.

Sex: The Misconstrued Package

[*Walking to the podium and tapping on the microphone*...]

“Hi everyone!” [Pause]

“Let me begin with where it should all begin… My name is Bonface Morris [Otunga]. I am a saved Kenyan guy in his twenties, born of a Kenyan father and a Kenyan mother; all from western Kenya. I am single. [Hehe ! And um not publicizing myself!] I love music, writing and watching movies. I am too talkative sometimes (which is one behavior of mine I always ask beforehand that those I interact with would at least tolerate lest they judge me) because I have a big problem with pretending to be an introvert. I also love having fun, but I neither go to disco clubs nor stripper clubs. I don’t smoke, I don’t drink and I don’t watch pornography. Although I have had a girlfriend (one girlfriend), I am still a virgin because I don’t think it is of importance [constructive and of integrity] to ask for sex from her for now considering that she is not my wife... and guys, I am standing before you today to talk about sex!

“It is the way our society (and not just this generation but also the previous) is reacting to and dealing with matters of sex that I have decided to deliver this speech. I know I may come out to be too loud, but I beg that you tolerate the noise because it is necessary. I feel that it is of great importance to talk about sex to normal people who live today, most of whom are the invisible yous’ that read this blog – because they are these normal people, these normal youth like me, to whom sex has become the paradox we love pushing under or pretentiously erasing…

“I may be a leader in one capacity, but that is not necessarily what drives me to talk about sex today. No. This inspiration came from what I have been seeing happen all around me from the day I was a child. It is about what the young people like me think about the topic of sex, what arises when there are  conflicts between us and our parents (read, the elderly) concerning sex and why we think sex is (or is not) important to us before and/or after marriage. I am not writing to imply that I am not [the least] tempted to have sex, or that I have already overcome the urge to have it at this phase of my life, but that I am here to advocate for what is right (and what is right is absolute),  which even if I myself may fail in doing it – because life gives us a place of falling and rising all the time – I (and we) can become better even in the worst that keeps coming my/our way, and I/we can achieve better standards on the same because I/we have potential, and that the best can never be achieved (when you compare man with God) until man believes that it can be achieved no matter what…

“My background has a story of a typical African family: one where parents never directly address matters of sex with their children, and especially, their teenage children on a head-on platform, forcing them to learn about sex in their only HARD WAY. My sisters and I had to learn about it that way – and each one of us in our own different ways…

“I remember when I was young, times of my sisters’ relationship mysteries. I remember of how they had to struggle with the torment their boyfriends put them in (and they had many of them – and I don’t mean that they were promiscuous, but what could teenagers their age have done to gain the attention from the opposite sex unless they attracted and accepted the proposals of as many boyfriends as possible in order to generate competition and feel accepted?). Whenever I accompanied them to visit their boyfriends, I could see just how much tempted they were by being nagged and forced into having sex. It was a predictable occurrence where you would know beforehand what will happen to such a boyfriend. Because sex was the driving force behind the boys having a relationship with them, while they (my sisters) seemed to be less interested, those relationships never lasted long enough for me to even know the names of those so-called ‘in-laws’ of mine.  

“I would see boyfriends being changed every season – one for every holiday. It is and it was the truth of the matter; and written all over their faces was the statement, “Men are so uncertain, they only love you for your body…!” They got used to it anyway – the bother for sex and the changing of boyfriends - and that my friends, according to me, was dangerous. It meant that before they ever had a stable relationship, many frogs had to be kissed, playing ‘hard to get’ would be the norm of the day and pretending to be ‘the tough lady’ would have to be the driving power…And as many of us know, kissing frogs and doing all those things means a lot of things to the girl-child…

“So because our parents never really taught us that much about sex (of which I urge today’s parents to beat that record), we grew up with a wrong picture of sex - in relation to my sisters as the girl-child. I don’t thank God that they (my parents) didn’t teach me more about sex, but I thank Him that He has taught me a lot about sex along the way. Although to say the truth, my father is such a free guy who can talk to you about almost anything, sex was not [and has not been] a topic he has ventured into very freely. Over time, he has showed he cares for my mom, which is a good thing to emulate, but has never directly talked to me (or any of my sisters as far as I know) about sex. We have never learnt much about sex from our mom either. The misunderstood aspect of sex fed to my sisters (they are only three above me anyway, so don’t imagine numbers) was given to them by themselves (if that makes sense) – by how they figured out themselves, men and sex whenever they broke up with one or another. Sex was never taught them by someone elderly or by our parents. That I guess, is what forced them into frailed spirituality when they were teenagers, because there was always a fight between the values Christianity taught them, what mama taught them, and the cruel truth of raging emotions and need for affection… making them to partially curve in and pave way for the powerful desire of gratifying what their bodies desired most – boys and attention…

“But I don’t blame them. And to set the record right, I don’t blame the girl-child [today] for anything. I won’t even call women weak. I don’t call women weak. I don’t call men strong either. My view is that, when sex is involved, weakness becomes relative, and anything relative can happen anytime to anyone… even to the so-called strong…It is only that what happened then made them grow up knowing that men are somehow some mysterious ‘animals’ whose sole desire is never majorly love, care and affection towards the woman, but lust (and that to me is a misinterpretation of what a man should be or is) and thereafter an endless crave to satisfy their sexual desires. [And by the way, I defend the knowledge I have that my sisters never engaged in sex with their boyfriends – as far as I know...] It was the pressure from those unworking ‘relationships’ that led to poor school results, a weird view of the male-child and a changed attitude towards our father…whom they never hated, but became mute towards for no good reason…

“Just to address the current, and as a by the way, I should let you know that if you have ever been in such a situation, or are still in such a situation, where you face pressure from within and without to engage in sex, know that I have dedicated this day to pray – just for you…

“Apart from my sisters’ story, here is my story: when I was young, I had a younger cousin of mine (an age mate), a guy I know wherever he is, is not interested in reading blogs… So when we were of the age of knowing “we are boys, and they are girls,” he taught me some few things with girls; things I guess I was too dump to get and understand. He was the active type (you know) , and because I was his friend, you know that there is no way I could not accompany him in his ‘mild errands’… With him, we did all things young boys of between the ages of 8yearsando 15years do – chasing after girls, ‘falling in love’, just basically doing what this generation calls running the town…But lucky as I was, I still felt that sex was out of topic (yet the Jesus I know today still had a decade or so from then until I met Him…). He was notorious, and I was not. I don’t know why, but sleeping with a girl was not something I valued. I valued nothing of these things they call ‘relationships’.  I didn’t value relationships with girls then because I was shy to break the rules my parents esteemed and kept but had never brought out to me to instruct me on…I don’t call myself good, because that may be the only sin I never committed until I met Jesus. [And I am very sure of that.]

“It is true that birds of the same feather flock together, but allow me to say that values and principles in a person help them shape their lives in a way that makes abstinence easier than their level of spirituality, because I know of some ‘very spiritual’ people who freely engage in sex without turning their heads around…And I don’t mean to say that you are ‘unforgivable’ or ‘weird’ if you have engaged in sex before marriage; I just mean to say that to some of us, weak points are elsewhere – and those may make us even worse before God as compared to the dude/dudette that has engaged in sex…  Sometimes, one unsaved/unreligious person can manage dealing with the pressure of sex more than the spiritual/pious one. But that does not imply that the less religious young man or lady faces less temptation or inclination towards pre-marital sex as compared to the Christian ones, no. It only means that the wiser you have become [Christian] as pertaining right and wrong, the more grieving the likeliness of your fall is when you are face to face with it… So, maybe my values helped me just a little when I was young not to do what my younger cousin knew was normal to do…

“My younger cousin had all the cause to destruct me; and I had all the power to direct my self to be lured by him. I have all the power to be lured into sex even today… Maybe God just wanted it that way… Yeah, maybe He also just wants it that way…it is a world of ‘maybe this’ or ‘maybe that’…I don’t know what held me then, and I don’t know what holds me now [but I am sure I know something about that], and I know that God is faithful to the end, if I mean to entirely depend on Him…

“We all have the freedom to choose what we want with our lives – and I had [and still have] that freedom – to engage in sex or not, to have a mpango wa kando or not... I have the freedom to choose what I wanna do with myself. That freedom neither belongs to my parent(s) nor to my friend(s). It belongs to me. Yeah, that freedom to choose what I wanna do with my life, with my body, when pressure to engage in sex comes up on me belongs to me…Only I am capable of controlling me…

“No matter how much crooked the world we live in has become, or how distorted its value system(s) have become, or how desperate people are for sex, or how all around us teenagers and young unmarried people are having sex, uncontrollably or not, each individual, each one of us, [pause], has the freedom to choose whether to obey or disobey the correct values passed on to them either by their parents, by society, by own self, or by God.

“The people who lived in the past faced the same challenges that we are facing today. Even the Bible says that nothing is new under the sun. Nothing. Nothing is new. Those people struggled with impure thoughts, with becoming holy as God is, with maintaining one spouse or partner, with sex and ideas of illicit sex,... They struggled with peer pressure, with lust and misdirected affections, with falling in love… They struggled with being faithful, with honesty, with sincerity… but those were their struggles, which should help us figure out how to fight our own… They struggled with not finding the right ones, with passions and with doubt…their struggles with matters of sex are innumerable… just as we have our own fight that requires enough bravery…

“We Christians love giving the example of Joseph from the Bible and how he flew from Potiphar’s wife, because it is easier to say, “Flee from youthful passions…” just as Joseph did (quoting Paul writing to Timothy), but it is another thing to address the issue at hand – these raging desires that conflict the way of the Spirit in us, and how to actually flee when need be…

“The fight against such an ungodly passion (where a young person desires/wants to engage in sex before marriage), requires a solution which is composed of the person’s desire to move away from such a passion, the action to disengage themselves from activities that make them vulnerable, some good company of friends and the help of God. Otherwise, we may as well just be fighting the air…All becomes vanity – chasing after the wind…

 “If our generation has portrayed to us sex as being the use and misuse of another person’s body in order to gratify our own selfish needs, we are in the danger of allowing ourselves to be carried away in such a storm of a world-view. You see, most of us have grown sex-frenzy due to exposure to information (whatsoever) that has threatened our standing and polluted out thinking, thus making sex an issue of great concern to Christian circles.

“Some of the factors that have made the struggle harder today are;

1. The emergence of Soap Operas during family TV-viewing time with messages of love, betrayals, manipulation and sex (Soaps are okay, but soaps are hoof-hay)
2. The emergence and exposure to modern sexting technology;
3. The increase/overload in the number of pornographic websites, innumerable nude music videos and availability of free sex movies;
4. Early introduction of children to sex by peers, parents or guardians;
5. Sexual abuse, harassment and rape
6. Commercial sex due to poverty or sex-addiction;
7. Lowered life standards and values;
8. Peer pressure or group influence
9. Insecurity (when a girl/boy gives her body to the boy so that she may feel appreciated by him)
10. Sugar mommies and daddies – lack of money and low self esteem being the underlying issues
11. The problem of highly engaging in masturbation
12. Seeking for attention and recognition by peers – trying to outdo or outshine others
13. Indecency in dressing (both guys and ladies)
14. Norms and outdated traditions about sex
15. Impure thoughts and conceptions with images of sex

“These factors have made the fight against illicit sex a nightmare in today’s living. Most minds have been polluted and misinformed. Sex is no longer preserved for marriage but for the greater whole. No-one feels exempted anymore…

“But I will ask, as my parting shot,

“Is this the generation we want? One without good value systems and reverence for God?

“One which has made sex a tool more than it is a pleasure for bonding by the married?

“Is this the understanding of sex that we want to pass on to the next generation? To our children?

“Do you still believe that abstinence is the better option?

“Do you still believe that purity is important in a generation in every way?

“Do you still advocate for the fact the God-fearing is inclusive of ‘no-sex-until-marriage’ policy?

“Redeem your answer now, and join me in the fight wherever you are - pray for someone, tell someone what you think about sex, correct someone on matters of sex, talk about sex my friend – talk about it… and that will just be a beginning for a better tomorrow… for our children and the next generation… for boys to come who will value the girl-child as their sisters and not as a sex tool… for the girl-child that will rise up in confidence to say no to intimidation through sex…

“It will be the beginning of a generation full of God-values and not own-good-values…!

“Go out there and make a change!”

“Thank you people, and may God bless you all…”

*[Handing over microphone and walking back to the audience...]*

Morris.

"I Am a Musician!"

There are so many of us, a good number to be precise, and the majority to be exact, who claim (or rather think or are entitled to the truth), that we can sing. In fact, we live in a rather musical society where everyone loves music. Our society loves music. That is the truth. It loves music to the extent that before the end of a [normal] day, everyone has at least sung a song – whether good or bad, Christian or secular – music rings all over our lives.

It is in our generation where everyone knows one or two things about music, a song and singing. Right from the youngest in our midst to the oldest, something about a song or music (regardless of the genre) is known and admired. The resulting effect is always some quality amusement because you see, what makes us have a very strong feeling that we can sing, or that we know music, may simply be because we know some lyrics to a famous song (which may as well only be ‘our’ only famous song) and because it is famous and common (inclusively of course), we can comfortably sing along to it. Sometimes, (and may God forbid), if that song ends up to be our favorite English song, we may crucify it (literally) and appoint to it another key or an altogether remixing accent...

But with all these, we still stand up (at least before our own selves if a congregation may not want to avail) and declare for all to hear (including the trees) that, “You see, I am a musician!”

Again, just because we sung so well in church last month or yesterday, and after the service everyone was like, “Oh my God! Was that you? Keep it up mun!”; and maybe our [genuine] worship team leader went like, “Morris (insert your name), wow, that was something you did on Sunday, mun!”, it doesn’t really translate to us being great worshippers. Not really.

We need to understand that God uses people differently in different seasons as He pleases, and at opportune times, He can use someone out there (which may be us at that time) just to astonish (or humble) the know-it-alls. Got it? So it may be that we are not ‘musicians!’ at all in every moment we declare to all that we are. Maybe we are just in the preparations stage. Maybe we are yet to become the musician we dream of. Maybe.

Maybe because it takes a lot to make a musician, quite a lot of time and a whole lot of things, God takes His time to make His own Musician in us… God thrills Himself in being the slow moving action taker or facilitator. He takes His time to do His stuff. And as mistaken as we may become about many things, like our ability rap or sing and twist vocals, and maybe our ability to ornament our voice(s) on a given day, that doesn’t qualify us to be ‘musicians!’ Just because we are the best back-up or lead vocalists there is in our town and that we can tell a key from another from a far, it doesn’t make us ‘musicians!’ Just because we can play the guitar or keyboard or piano or a certain instrument alongside singing, we are not guaranteed a seat in the park of musicians… It does not guarantee us the privilege of being musicians for God. Being able to hold a microphone and confidently raise a voice before people in order to make them respond to our prodding does not make us anointed singers either! It does not…!

Another support for our ‘profound’ declaration(s) of musicianship is gotten through our easy access to several genres of music today. Because music is all over the place, we have that unlimited opportunity to prioritize our song choices – too many songs means a freedom of choice. And because we have too much music on our finger tips, and that our friends happen to know we love these songs [in these genres], we may just end up being their friend that sings ‘that song’ so well… or their friend that sings ‘just like so-and-so’… And it therefore pushes us into growing up knowing and declaring, “Aaah! I can sing!” “They say/said I can sing, so I can sing!” “I am a musician!” “Yaaaaaay! I. AM. A. MUSICIAN!” Bla bla bla…

That is exactly the case with most of us. We grow up knowing we can sing because a friend, or our mom, or dad, or aunt, or fiancée or woreva, was positive about our voice(s) when they heard us singing a certain song… It excites us, and turns us around. It becomes our motivation. It becomes the string we hang on in order to amplify our musicianship… And I don’t deny it. It is a positive thing. It is a good thing to have people support us. But, do you think we can manage to support and stand up to our musicianship on our own? Do you think we can declare that, “We believe we can make it, because we can make it! Because we were born to make it in such things! Because God has appointed us to make it?” Can we do that? If we can, the safer we may be…

Considering that there are so many musicians today, innumerable musicians, qualification(s) that make one a musician are normally differed. We are excused to think we are who think we are because of our own many reasons – and those reasons are acceptable. It is our life, right? Ain’t this world a relative, inclusive and free world?  Let us be whatever we say we are – even though many [like Morris] may deny it…And I fear adding up our already big number of musicians…because I know I will end up judging myself to favor myself… It happens to all of us, doesn’t it?

I do watch Tusker Project Fame. I watch it not to celebrate the product but to learn some few things about music – for free! I learnt that everyone can sing – in their own way; but what differentiates between a music-singer and a passionately-singing-musician are some few basic things. In an audition of singers, we only need to ask them some few basic questions in order to fully get their musicianship.

Ask them the following questions for example as a partial test (and ask them in the listening of many others) to gauge the confidence they have in what they know they are;

a)     What music genre do you love/prefer most?

b)     Which musician really does it for you that you feel to somehow been partially mentored by their musical style?

c)      Which [one] song can I play you 100 times in a day and you still will need it played more and more?

d)     Please sing the last line to that song without the first lines [in a given key] – give them time to articulate the song first…

e)     Can you back-up any singer singing any key, or do you have problems with backing-up when someone is leading the singing?

f)       Do you have a calling in music? (For the Christian guys)

g)     Which key do you comfortably sing in? Tell us how long you can comfortably sing in that key?

h)     Do you do ‘me alone’ rehearsals with your voice often? How many times (or how long) in a week? How many songs do you do per session? What are the genres you practice most in these sessions in relation to improving your vocal range?

i)       How often do you change your key? What is your vocal range? Can you sing falsettos? (to the male guys). Have you at any time preferred a certain vocal range? Are you able to move from one key to another with ease? Have you ever tried doing so?

NB: These questions may also apply to the instrument players but in a varied scope of questioning…

If you claim to be a musician (or whatever you may want to call yourself) and you still are unable to answer the questions above without much a-do, you still have a long way to go my friend…

The truth is, music is not all about singing. (And allow me to say this even if I have never produced a single song or recorded a song now or passé). Music is more than just a song. Music is deeper than a song. Music is music. Music is about understanding movements, chords, emotion, life, trances, captivations, anger, peace and voices. It is an emotion. It is an art. It is a feeling. It is a desire. Music is so many things… Once a musician understands music, everyone will know that they are musicians without their declaration. Everyone will fell the confidence in their voices, the passion in their singing, the longing in their hearts to become better… All those things speak for themselves if we know who we are and are able to prove it in every way…

This makes me say that if one day God enables me to be in a position to make auditions for a worship team (because that is what I do), I won’t begin with vocal tests. Nope. I will start off somewhere further than vocals. I will begin with the person’s knowledge of their music. I will start with who they are as far as music is concerned. I will want them to prove it to the assembled people around them that they are whatever they claim they are… and therefore making a star (or stars) out of them will not be a big deal; nor will it be a big deal for God to use them – because God is also concerned about skills…

Morris.

Money, Money, Money

Money is money my friend. And the talk about money (as I have come to know from many people who talk about it) almost always comes out money-ish. Money-ish because money is like an affair – well known and regarded by many, but rarely talked about. It is like an affair because it is ‘better’ left underground than exposed or talked about. That is how we all feel at most. Money-ish talk is hated because many people tend to assume that we don’t talk about money unless we are loaded and again reloaded… meaning that we should be having money in order to talk about money. I don’t know if that is right, and considering that I am a man, and that men “don’t love talking about money because such talk demands too much from them”, I tend to also bow my head and try to whisper on this post rather than shout as I always do…

I think that it is petty thinking for someone to think that we should only talk about stuff when we are ‘well equipped’ to do so. Maybe what we should consider is that – the more you surge into the unknown, the more you will have the urge to become better in such depths, [maybe] while being motivated by the power of overcoming the underdog spirit and the possibility of being better at a game you were thought to be a failure at... So the question becomes: How can we ever invent new ways of doing things or dealing with issues and become anew [and better], while at the same time avoid being like our predecessors unless we try out the things they never tried when they were our age and do (not just try to do) the things they never did?

So what I call money-ish talk in this post is such talk about money that comes out as expensive, intricate and more financial – and by financial I mean “talk of finances/money-related-issues-gurus”. Gurus talk money-ish talk. I talk money-talk. The common thing about the two is money, but the difference is money. Money-ish talk leaves one breathless and suffocated, judged and tormented, helpless and blurred. Money-talk is just between us – no professionalism included. Just plain money and all that… So I want you to ease yourself because I am not going to be money-ish - at least not for today…

I have been walking around, relating with and making observations and also engaging with people both in the Christian and secular world just to find out views of young people like myself on issues of money. I have no statistics but I have observations; and those are enough to make statistics, right?

One thing that I have found-out out there is that people tend to value or devalue others with regard to the presence or absence of money. Society depicts us as relative and able to be accommodated when we have something to offer… when we can bring something to the table… when we can call out shots with the influencing power of finances… when we are stable pocketwise… when we can’t and won’t beg… when we command things around and give orders to two or three people who submissively obey us… when our money, money, money language is at tops and can’t be locally challenged…

A lady or a guy [or gentleman] today is likely to accept to be in a [working] relationship with a man [or woman] more in the following order (considering and assuming that love or the chemistry between them is triggered by the degree affluence of either); they should look good (most of which is determined by what they wear that requires money in order to afford – from clothing to shoes, to grooming), they should be of good status (as determined by the gadgets they possess – phone, laptop, car, a great house…), they should be educated (who buys ‘good English’ anymore, or a ‘paper degree’ in any case? – good schooling needs money, and that translates to one coming from a financially stable family or they themselves being stable), they should be supportive (above 50% of the support being financial)…

So we come to realize that if the other party scores below the bar (whatever the set bar may be), and they are in most cases neglected, discriminated or assumed when matters of money, money, money collide with their desires. It is that bad. Life becomes that challenging to the single man/woman… Money, money, money… No wonder there are many single people claiming that they just can’t find THAT right person for them, bla bla bla…

70% [that is my guess] of relationships and marriages today are either made or unmade by the presence or absence of money. It is always money this, and money that… and a relationship or marriage is thus put into weird parts of a balance…

And to move further, the chaos is even in the church – this money, money, money thing. It can be seen when one family or person is respected, honored and highly regarded by others (leave alone the pastor) and more cared for… just because they are better in giving more offering or tithe, or because they contribute more to church projects…

When one is moneyed, they can’t hide. Money is too loud. It shouts all day, and hails your countenance all night. It magnifies one’s presence that a short man will never be short when money is what he/she daily multiplies. Money hides no one, and no one eternally hides their financial ability. Money speaks a language of its own that keeps popping up details about a given man/woman. Money says so many things about a person that is mostly left unspoken. That is money my friend… That is money. Money and its power on our countenance… Ecclesiastes 7:12a [NIV]: “Wisdom is a shelter as money is a shelter…”

Money is all about knowing that it exists, and that in its existence, it has power. It is all about knowing how to honestly get it and that it is beautiful when it is well used; and [partially] acknowledging that your desire to meet it (and in one way or another, to use it) is probably more saturated than that towards your Bible… It is also important to acknowledge that we all need a level of financial independence or stability in our friends or family or in our own lives; and that today’s world is so much centered on money – it being almost what makes up what men/women do today. We need to realize that the talk is no longer about the basic needs we were taught about while growing up, but about another that we have learned is more essential today… money, money, money… Our generation has taught us something different. Our orientation towards money has increased. And it is increasing more and more as generations go by. Our longing for money has heightened. That is the way it is… We therefore live with that reality…

But on the other hand, we need to accept the realities availed to us, evaluate them, and later sweep them over with a broom of Truth – that the countenance of a man is not made up of wealth and things thereof… but of his relationship(s) with fellow men and with God. Thus if money is of greater importance to a man than another’s comfort, respect or welfare, that man has forgotten that which Christ did for us, and that which He became in order that we may come forth as the people we should be  (2 Corinthians 8:9: For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though he was rich, yet for your sakes he became poor, so that you through his poverty might become rich.) I am not saying that we should be poor, as in poor, but that the Scripture above points out Christ, the greatest of them all, to not have valued His heavenly wealth and pomp (at least for a time) in order to make us acquire that which we even never knew of – the Kingdom of heaven; yet we who should be His most devoted followers, act prejudiciously against others and value the wealth of this world above fellow men… We should be more ashamed, and more humiliated at the direction of our filthy actions… for our righteousness has become like filthy rags…But more important, even in the event of our filthiness, we should with repentant hearts remember that “…the love of money [above all else] is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs…” (1 Timothy 6:10) …

So what shall we do? Nothing?

Shall we say and do nothing?

No, we will neither say nor do nothing

For ‘nothing’ should exist not to the living

We will tell it loud to everyone assembled

That money, money, money; that sweet and tasty thing

That mighty and destructive thing - is only momentary

It shall fade away; it shall drawn away

So allow not yourself to drain away… with it…

O, money, money, money

You little paper thing

You small clustered metal

That on the minds of men

Cries, “Honey, honey, honey”…

Money, money, money

Shall we ever know today how to live with,

And henceforth kill your might?

Morris.