Sometimes

Sometimes you understand everything. 

Sometimes you don't. 

Sometimes you walk with your head high, other times you don't. 

Sometimes you're bold - bold as a lion. 

Other times you're shy - afraid even of your own self. 

Sometimes you win, sometimes you don't, sometimes you're just lost between - trying to differentiate the two. 

Sometimes you grow up, sometimes you mature, sometimes you just stay stuck somewhere between. Sometimes you remain the same. 

Sometimes you don't even know where you are!

Sometimes you change - you really do. 

Other times you don't.

Other times you abhor change and trifle and struggle with your rigidity.

Sometimes you fight, and rant, and yell, and roll, and toss on the ground.

These times you are an animal - lost in the madness of self. 

These times you are thunder and lightning, painful and thorny.

Other times you're a dove, a lamb and a butterfly. 

These times you are an angel - swallowing the embers of life with immortal ability. 

Whisking everything with ease and peace.

Sometimes you forget people. 

Other times you don't.

Sometimes you remember them. 

Other times you don't.

Sometimes they are real, other times they are not. 

People are remembered. People are forgotten. 

All the time. 

People exist in the middle of remembrance and forgetfulness. 

Sometimes you wonder why some people are to be remembered at all. 

Sometimes you just sit there and your mind just remembers them. Just like that!

Sometimes you hate it. 

Sometimes you don't.

Sometimes you count your blessings. 

Sometimes you forget. 

Sometimes you blame God, sometimes you blame people, other times you blame the devil, and rarely, you blame yourself. 

Sometimes you only seem to see the half-empty cup. 

You stare at it. You feel disgusted. Half empty. You don't like anything half empty. 

No one does.

Most of the time, you forget that it is also half full.

Man is an incessant creature when dealing with numbers. 

O! What an obsession we have for greater numbers!

Sometimes I wonder why man has to be like so...

Sometimes everything is a mystery. 

Sometimes you feel it is good for everything to remain but a mystery. 

It keeps you safe not knowing things.

Other times you are angry at the mysteries and hidden things in (your) life.

Other times you fight to know.

Sometimes it feels good to be here on earth.

Other times you cry out loud to Heaven wanting to get home.

These times are the toughest.

These times are also the easiest to live. 

It all depends.

Sometimes you are strong, other times you are weak. 

But it is all the same. 

Strength and weakness make no difference at all.

You are weak here, you are strong there, you are both.

You are successful here, you are a failure there, you are both.

It is all the same.

Sometimes you have to act a fool in order to know.

Other times you have to be the one who knows in order to confront the fool. 

I have discovered that life wavers itself between these two. 

Going back and forth. 

Like waves.

Nothing is new. 

It is just a repetition of things of the past...

Ecclesiastes 1:9 (ESV) ​"What has been is what will be, and what has been done is what will be done, and there is nothing new under the sun"

I have found out that the wisest of men is the one who learns (daily) how to balance himself/herself between too much knowledge and too much foolishness. 

The one who learns - but never claims to fully know - about things. 

Who patiently awaits his/her moment of wisdom and truth.

Because sometimes, yes sometimes, there is actually no difference between the two. 

They are all the same. 

Yes, wise people and fools are all the same.

It just depends with who is saying so.

Bonface Morris.

Letter to My Dad

Dear dad,

I was supposed to post this eight days ago but my love for this nation, as you have always taught me, overwhelmed me. I chose to post it today. Please read on...

I have been wanting to write this for a long time - for a really long time. And I am sure you know that I am not pretending. You know that I am not pretending because you have known me all along. You know that when I tell you I have been wanting to write this, it is the truth. You know that it is the truth. The plain truth.
I have been wanting to do this, but time and circumstances have been scolding me out. But now I have gathered time and energy and guts… and I choose to write to you – to a man who has gone through thick and thin, who seems not so great to many but is still one of the greatest men I've ever known. I choose to write to this man – to you - because I want and I need to. I don’t wanna wait for some other day for me to pour out my heart, no. I am doing it right now, I am doing it today.

Dad, this is for you. I don't care if you'll read it or not, but I'm writing it for you. Yes, just for you. And yes, I am still that small, tiny baby of yours, but now just saying things I have wanted to say for a while… right here.

Dad, it has been a while since we experienced life together. It has surely been a while. I have grown older, and you too have aged on. I have grown more independent, and you have become fonder of my mom – you had missed her, right? All those years with you staying out here where I now am, I know you missed her…

I still remember those moments when we used to live together – moments when you used to call me Senior… Do you remember them? I remember them with some sort of astute vigor. They can’t just pale away. No, not ever. I remember not being so good, because I wasn't. I was intolerable. I was a prude. I was rigorous and spoilt (not by you but into my own ways), I was meticulous but messy. Remember?
I still remember how much life challenged us together. You talk about it sometimes. Over the phone. When I visit. Many times. You talk about it many times. I can’t forget where we have come from – you and I. I can’t. I remember how we forged ourselves around life and the Lord our God still made us through. I remember our wanting to doubt His presence because of the conniving amplitude of our grievous circumstances. I remember I told you right in the middle of such moments that I was gonna grow up to become great. You believed it. A little. The problem was that I believed it too much – because that is who I am. I am not yet that great, but I am heading there. You know I will be great one day. You know it, dad.

Now dad, let me go back a few steps - a few years back – when I used to kick at you as a thief. I guess I was only 8, or was it 10? Remember when I used to steal your money? And run away for a couple of days? I worried you. I really did. You beat me up. You wanted me to change. You worked on me really tight.  (Yeah, I was and I still am your only son, but man, you did work on my butts, lol.) Did you ever imagine that I was gonna write you letters like this one? Even once? Okay dad, here I am, all changed but still weird as ever – because as you know it, this is who I am…

Then came the days in my High School when life was really tough. (Only you and mom - and probably Jay - understand it when I say it was tough.) It was tough. But I thank God that they are these moments that brought me closer to Him. They are these moments that begun creating character out of me. They are these moments that have forged the person that I am today. And you know it too. Those High School days made Morris what he is today: a boy who believes too much, never gives up and... lemme leave it at that...

Dad, I have not grown into a man yet - not really. I am still undergoing change. I am still some work in progress. I am some sort of a messed up royal boy (you know I belong to Heaven too.) I have grown up to know a few things about human beings - their volatile nature, their pettiness, their lack of sense in direction, their sarcasm, their greed, their rage... I have had friends, broken out, build trust, broken some and life is still moving on. Yeah, I always move on. I refuse to be stuck in my past. I have made mistakes, I have faced betrayal, I have been lied to, I have had fake and real friends, I have acquired Wisdom, I have accumulated ideas, and my ambitious nature is still flaming on… I have learnt a lot from life already…

Dad, I work (yeah, I am a little lazy but I work). I take care of myself (thanks to God), I serve God, I go to school (yeah, but I never tell you about my school grades though, lol – because I think I have grown up to be accountable only to myself about what I do in school – and dad, you should not however ask those guys in school about my bad manners because man, I am bad news... :-))

Okay dad, school aside, let’s move on… (About school, this will need a face-to-face chat...)

There is another story I need to tell you though – a story about my love life. Have I ever told you that I once met a girl, fell in love, and felt like the moon was dripping honey into my world? Hah, okay allow me to summarize it for you right here…

A few years ago, you shared with me about your story and mom, remember? Yeah, I was keen, listening. (When it comes to this stuff, always be sure that we are listening… :-)) So you shared with me and I was intrigued. After a while, I met this lady. She was great. Yeah she was. She loved the Lord. Oh well, she did. And we fell in love. Oh yes, we did. We truly fell in love. Dad, it was real. It was so real. So real. (Yeah, something close to you and mom.) And we puddled in the oceans of this thing called love for a while. We did. We puddled for a while. For a good while. But later, dad, the sad (or good) thing is that things fell apart. Well, I messed it up. I take the blame as a man. (You taught me this.) No blame games. I moved on.
I am bringing back this story to show you that I tried. I really tried. I think I was a good boyfriend. Well, I later realized that I went in too early – I needed to get a bit older to know a few things about loving someone... I am now single. Single and comfortable. I know a few ladies. I make friends. So don’t be worried about that – bout your only son getting married. I will get married. Some day. (Lol.) I know you are okay with that. I know it because you always encourage me to take my time. Yes old dude, you understand these things…

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Yes dad, you are a great man. I am writing this letter to tell you that you are a great man. I am celebrating you today. We are celebrating you right now. You may not have been angelically perfect, but you have been good to us. You have been a great dad. I will say that your greatness is not determined by how much people think of you but by what me and my sisters know of you as our dad, and what our mom thinks and knows about you. We have laughed together. We have celebrated together. We have cried and wept together. You have never given up on us. Never. You have given us chances to make our own decisions. We make mistakes, but we learn from them and move on. You have loved our mom. You have not been unfaithful as far as we know. You have not been an addict of any sort. You have loved us. You have never ever beaten our mom. (This means a lot to us.) You have not even shouted at her. You have shouted at us, but not at her. We feel and know that you love and respect her. You have given her the freedom as a woman to do whatever she pleases for the well-being of our family. We have grown to love both of you equally. You have never discriminated among my siblings by favoring one at the expense of others. You have treated us equally. (This also means a lot to us.) We have nicknamed you and you have always smiled about it… oh my, which other family calls their dad by his nickname – a weird nickname - and he still goes along with it? Very few. Now do you get what I am talking about? You are a great man. We thank the Lord for you.

Now dad, because you old people don’t love reading long letters, I am going to cut it short by sharing with you a few lessons I learnt from you. I am thankful for the following;

1.     You taught me to grow into a man - into a man whose manhood is not determined by how much he earns or succeeds or by his level of education or by how many women he chases and/or sleeps with, but by how well he treats those around him. At least I laugh just as much as you do and I make just as many friends. As you always said, “Invest in people, the returns will be exorbitant.” I am trying to follow this rule. I am trying.

2.     You taught me to take responsibility. You taught me that in order to be a man worthy my salt, I’ll need to learn to take charge, be available and get committed to something that does not only benefit me, but others too. Yeah, I am also trying out on this one. I am trying to lead. I try to say “I’m sorry”. I try not to shift blames to innocent people. I am not perfect, but I DO try to be responsible.

3.     You taught me to hold my ground and believe in myself. Yes, I think this is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Believing in myself has made me to stand strong in my salvation even when all young people my age think that it is crazy to do so. I don’t move with crowds, I seek to stand out. I am my own logo. I am my own command. Dad, some people hate me for this but I think I am cool with it. It has also made me noisy and taught me to stand for my rights and for the rights of others...

There are many things I would want to add into this letter but I can do so some other time… And dad, please tell mom that I will be writing a piece for her soon. Tell her that her-boy-grown-blogger-cum-scientist will be writing something specifically for her. You two mean the whole world to me. I love you both… May the Lord increase and satisfy both of you with blessings and long life.

Your dear son,

Morris.

Note: To all that have never had a father like mine, I dedicate this song by Joel Engle: The Father I Never Had to you all. |God will always be the available Father you never had. May you find comfort in His arms.

#MpeketoniAttack: Possible Solutions

Late yesterday, as I watched football, [sic], I was writing a letter to my dad which I had planned to post on my blog this morning, but things happened to move so fast and I found myself overhearing information on #MpeketoniSiege or #MpeketoniAttack courtesy of Twitter. (Yeah, Twitter is our all-time CNN on this side of the world.) I have therefore chosen, as a patriot and a true Kenyan, to scribble a few notes on solutions to terror attacks that have grown rampant in this nation. I'll still post that letter though - somewhere in the course of this week, I know that my dad will still understand ;-) - so keep peeping...

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As a Kenyan, nothing pains me more than seeing my fellow citizens in such a beautiful and free nation suffer due to lack of insecurity. Just in a period of less than one year, so many have died, so many families have lost their loved ones and pain has been eminent across the country. We have all been affected by these terror attacks I none way or another.

Instead of sitting around and complaining, and as a devoted Christian, I have stopped and prayed: for those families victimized by these attacks. I have also fasted endlessly, (this is not blabbing - God is my witness), and talked to the Lord about our situation and I know that as sure as He listens to our prayer, He is going to come though, help and save us.

But to add on this, I have a few recommendations to the JUBILEE government which I will list below as part of what I think is part of the solution to this problem instead of spending endless days on empty politics and stop-gapping CORD which is just playing its role in ensuring that the government is on its feet and is ardently serving the citizens of this great republic.

Note: I am neither JUBILEE nor CORD.

One of the houses torched by the attackers.

Residents view two vans that were burnt down.

Note: The above images/photos are courtesy of www.standardmedia.co.ke

Here are the recommendations;

1. Allow the Police Force and security organs to use mobile phones as a way of enhancing real-time communication between citizens and our security forces. We are in the 21st century, and you can bet that over 70% of the Kenyan population has access to a mobile phone. At least one out of ten people can access a mobile phone within a walking area of 10 minutes. Let the Police get toll free mobile numbers for every police station across the country and make these numbers accessible for reporting any incidences on suspected terror attacks. It is that easy: dedicate these numbers to suspected terror attacks and once we are done, make them open to other criminal incidences. We all know that calling 112 or 999 in this nation is only comparable to going to the moon by plane: a big failure. Why is it so hard for the government to buy cheap phones and dedicate them to this task? CCTV cameras don't give real-time feedback when such remote areas as Mpeketoni are concerned, mobile phones will help. Someone can report shootings this fast, and the police should be ready to listen to us. (And it doesn’t need to be the police doing it. The government can create a special unit to freely receive information from citizens all day long.) Security agencies should know that we the citizens of this great republic sometimes know more about terror suspects than they do. Give us an open platform to deliver information to you!!

2.   Liaise with foreign governments to obtain security intelligence on terror attacks.  The government should stop being proud and ease itself towards gaining knowledge on how to run our security. Pride precedes a fall. Just this morning, the national broadcaster reported that the Al Shabaab are claiming ownership of the attacks that begun yesterday at 8pm. Intelligence is important and it should not be taken for granted. If western countries begun evacuating their citizens from Mpeketoni in the afternoon of yesterday before the attacks, why didn’t the government act to ask them why they were doing this? Is it not just pride at the expense of innocent citizens?

3.   Security is a priority and the right of every Kenyan, so the government should stop politicizing it. The opposition under CORD has argued that there is need for dialogue to solve the problems facing this nation – amongst them being security. The government has thrown aside such a possibility and the only thing they seem to be good at is heckling away CORD and banning their rallies. CORD may not have requested for the need for dialogue in the best way, but the underlying truth is that dialogue is important to solving the problems we are facing as Kenyans, and the problems we are likely to face in future if action is not taken. Kenya is a democracy and if our government is not autocratic, (although I have a feeling that is where we are headed), it should allow for dialogue to continue for the good of the whole nation. The more we politicize security matters, the more free Kenyan citizens suffer due to the arrogance and pride of our leadership. Open communication in solving a major Kenyan problem should not be underrated or overlooked due to petty politics.

4. Equip our police. I say it again: equip and motivate our police!!! Let me give you an analogy: How can a university student belonging to a campus that has less competence, facilitation and minute infrastructure compete in a market that is overcrowded with other students that are well trained and equipped? He/she can’t. In the same way, let the government first equip the policemen in these highly vulnerable zones before rolling out this upgrade to other areas. I hear that the attackers had better and more sophisticated weaponry – to the extent of even attacking a police station!! This is unacceptable!! We all know that Lamu and Mombasa counties and the major cities and towns in this country are more vulnerable to attacks than any other areas. Why not start with improving police facilities, equipment and remuneration in these areas before any other areas in our country? Why make budget allocations that never benefit the intended purpose? Why is the government not uptight in its priorities as far as governance is concerned? Who advices the president on decision making? Don’t they see and witness these things?

5. Give us the truth. Yes this goes out to all those bosses in the security firms in this nation: please give us the truth. When we are attacked, we need the truth, not second-hand half-truths-and-half-lies!! Stop the speculations by giving us the truth! In this internet age, we always have the truth. We only need you to give it back to us. This is a fact. Make us common citizens trust in you. Make us believe that you are the best leaders to hold those positions you are in. You should stop making the president of this nation and his government looking bad by giving us false information and half-truths. You have been appointed to a task, please carry it out faithfully. Don’t lie to us as you would lie to an animal. We have common sense, we see what is happening, so please just give us the truth!!

6. Stop victimizing Muslims. People could give the best information under the freedom of speech, but once they realize that this information is going to be held against them because of their religious affiliation, you may never get it from them. This is what is happening to our Muslim brothers in this nation: they are being victimized for wrongs (I guess) they have not committed. A basic police training rule says that, “You may never get genuine information from a person you have already concluded to be a criminal…” Of all Muslims in the world, I think Kenyan Muslims are the least radical. I am of the opinion that whoever brings about the chaos in this nation is a foreigner who comes in to radicalize our Muslim youth, and therefore without these foreigners, not many Muslim youth will get entangled in violence and murder. Is this so hard to understand and correct?

I am praying for the affected, but we still need action from our government. We need action to ensure safety to the citizens of this land!

I close my case.

Bonface Morris.

Beauty For Ashes

Note: I delivered this sermon yesterday during our Youth Day at my church. I hope it will be a blessing to you all. All Scripture quotations are from the ESV Bible unless otherwise.

Key verses: 1 Samuel 2:1-8; Luke 1:46-55; Isaiah 61:1-3

If we are keen in our walk with God, each one of us has had an experience in life (and with God) where we have doubted whether He is present in our lives or not...

We attend church, we serve God, we do many things in His name... We may be faithful givers and generous both in the church and to many others out there. We may be the most pious people, those who feign all kinds of hypocrisy... but we seem not to see the results of our labor upon what we need God for...

At this point (maybe), we may be tempted to call out to God like Nehemiah or like Hezekiah - to claim what is rightfully ours as His faithful servants, but it still does not bring out the fruits in our lives and we still cannot experience breakthrough or a favor in our lives (or so we think)...

We may try to proclaim Scripture, dig ourselves into God's Word, become more faithful (just like Hannah did) and later on, after things have failed to work out, we are inclined to make songs like "It Is Well With My Soul" or "Thou My Everlasting Portion" (which are good songs by the way) our official anthems because we have learnt about pain and suffering the tough/hard way.

Doubt then grows within us and our hearts are inclined towards it making us hardened by it. This doubt is not only common, but normal. It is because man is his natural sense is not subjective to pain but to happiness and pleasure.

In short, you are experiencing a season of ashes - where not much seems to work and many things in your life are in chaos.

But the one thing we lack to ask ourselves in this state is: what if God is using our season of ashes to create beauty out of us? What if God is not enjoying our suffering but that He is using it for His glory? What if His plan is to make us better in every area of our lives? The song sang earlier describes this... "What if your blessings come through raindrops? What if your healing comes through tears? What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes for us to know that God is near? What if?"

The apostle Paul was able to celebrate on a few occasion of his ashes because He knew what mannaer of beauty they will bring forth. Read Romans 8:18 and 2 Corinthians 12:1-10.

But ashes do not automatically turn into beauty. They do not. It takes time. And patience. And endurance. It takes God. It takes the Spirit of God to turn ashes into beauty. It is not the working of man that turns ordinary people into extraordinary people... Beauty is not the working of man, but the working of God. Ecclesiastes 3:11 (ESV) says, "He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man's heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end...". It is also worthwhile to note that a season of ashes does not last forever - it is only for a moment. (Ecclesiastes 3:1-8)

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God has an order of doing things which He always follows through while dealing with mankind, (especially His children). Unless it is completed, He is not complete with him/her (Romans 5:1-5). He seeks to develop character from us through trials and suffering. It may not be easy, but it is worthy it. Many servants of God had to pass through this season in order to learn how He works and to understand His Will for their lives.

So although your life, your business, your health, your body, your family, your education, your plans may be in ashes right now (a season of pain and suffering which no-one else can relate with but you and God) making you feel that God is absent (and probably uncaring); I assure you that the process is not yet complete - once God is done with you, you'll come out pure and better: Romans 5:1-5; Job 23:10; Hebrews 12:3-11.

There are examples of people who were expunged from ashes and transformed into beauty: Abraham, Moses, Job, Joseph and the example of Hannah we read earlier on.

These people discovered a few things about what God was doing in their lives and this caused them not to easily give up. Faith worked them out of their situations when they believed in God. And on the account of their faith, Hebrews 11 was written. We celebrate their beauty today regardless of how ashed they had earlier been i.e. people laughing at Hannah and Sarah for being barren.

So, people of God, what turns the ordinary into the extraordinary? Ashes into beauty?

Here are some few facts to consider;

1.    The anointing (the Holy Spirit) - an example is Saul in 1 Samuel 10:1-8. After Saul received the anointing as Samuel poured oil on his head (as a sign of the Holy Spirit), he became extraordinary. Saul and his family did not know that losing those donkeys was going to be God's highway to blessing them and making them the first family in the whole of Israel!!

2.    Faith that comes with the calling of God and surety that comes with God and His Word (Isaiah55:10-11). They believed that God can do whatever He says and they NEVER EVER change their minds about it. They had been given a task and they were ready to take it on to the end because they knew the Lord was with them - as He had promised.

3.    Confidence in who they are in God. (Job 19:25 and Psalm 42:5-11.) This moved them not to doubt that they are in His plan, thus although they were tempted to doubt (as shown in Psalm 13), they still held on to Him who was able to accomplish what He said.

Brethren, can we therefore strive to gain knowledge of God's Will for our lives (as shown in Hosea 4:6) so that we may understand the season through which God is making us grow through because a reward awaits us after the suffering for a good cause? (Romans 8:18 and 1Corinthians 15:58)?

Let us pray about this so that these seasons may be well defined before us and that we may gain a heart of endurance and patience as we await God's strength to come on us and create beauty out of our ashes...

God bless you all.

Bonface Morris.

21 Facts About Love and Falling in Love

Note: Well, it is raining outside, and I am here to do what I do best... This is an impromptu post inspired by a few experiences I've heard from the people around me, from my world of relationships and mostly in the early part of today (this Saturday);

1.   You are not the first one, and you won't be the last one to fall in love, so stop thinking that it has only happened to you. That friend of yours has had it before, it is just that they talk about it less.

2.   Don't allow love to make you stupid. Use your heart, but again, use your mind. Using one without the other leaves you half-lame and half-idiotic.

3.   Love is a beautiful thing, but if it is not well tamed, it can be the worst thing that happened to you.

4.   If someone has made "your world to stop", that person is the most dangerous thing in your life right now. Give them boundaries unless you really want your life to STOP.

5.   If two people are fighting for the love of one person (say two dudes are in for this one chiq), it is the chiq who is stupid and doesn't know what she wants. She is likely to lose both of them.

6.   Don't talk to us about love if you are in a relationship with more than one person. That is either lust or infatuation.

7.   We Christian men and our fellow ladies are too naïve to fall in love because we mostly fear rejection, but we should never (anyway, it is obvious that we can't) force anyone to be in a relationship with us all in the name of God. It is stupid. Falling in love should come out naturally, and it should never be impulsive.

8.   Love is not the end of life. Fall in love, but have a life. I say it again: fall in love, but have a life. This will make your love make sense and last longer.

9.   Correction and rebuke are part of "I love you so much that I can't handle losing you...". Anyone who positively criticizes you and rebukes you is the best partner you can ever have.

10. Love is not sex, and sex is not love. Stop misusing and mixing the two. They exist independently from each other. Thus both the man who wants proof of love through sex, and the woman who wants the proof of love through money share the same thing: silliness and greed.

11. If I love you, I should be ready to sacrifice a few things I DEARLY LOVE in order to be with you. If not, I am just using you as a means to my well-being, and I am selfish, egotistic and mean... Yeah.

12. Love is not one-sided. It always gives back. The best love is when it is mutually shared and exchanged. One-sided love (where only one person loves the other) is as bad as a man/woman with one leg, one hand and one eye trying to climb a tree. Utterly incomplete. Utterly horrendous.

13. Gifts don't buy love. Try honesty, trust and openness. They may buy it a little. (Just a little.)

14. If you are falling for someone, tell them. Don't regret it later when they are already taken. It takes a lifetime to fall in love and to find your type, (oh well, that's not a fact but an assumption) so don't waste opportunities when they're presented to you. (I hope y'all saved dudes are hearing me on this one.)

15. Make friends. Laugh. Don't take life too seriously. The more easy-to-interact-with and easy-to-approach people find you, the more attractive you become; thus the higher your chances of falling in love. Only 1% of the total population of human beings is interested in boring people. At least be boring but attractive. (Lol.)

16. Love is like a machine - it always needs lubricants called affirmation and affection; love is like a vehicle - it can't move unless it is driven, so be wise around it.

17. Love can die, but love cannot be buried. It has no grave that befits its greatness. We can pretend to stop loving people, but we can never pretend about how they make/made us feel. That is a fact.

18. We can fall in love a million times, but every time we do so, it is different. We can never fall in love in the same way and with the same intensity. It is always different all the time. This also, my friend, is a fact.

19. Everyone falls in love and everyone can fall in love. We just fear admitting it.

20. You may think differently about people you have been in relationships with, but you SHOULD NEVER think differently about love. It is the same all through - pure, perfect, selfless, unending and never failing. That is love. 

And;

21. I'm not in love, so stop being curious and stop asking already... :-)

For more information, please contact heaven and ask for Jesus Christ. There is no one who knows about these things more or better than He does.

Never stop loving. Keep that fire burning...


Bonface Morris.

Musings And Observations Part 2 (Church Edition)

If you have not yet read part one of this series of blog posts, read it here.

In the recent past, I have had spontaneous "micro-debates" with random people about the Church, sound doctrine and the universality of religion. These discussions may not have been conclusive enough - to the point of deriving meaningful inferences - but I have (at least) come to understand a few things about how people interpret and understand religion and matters of Faith.
There is a certain conclusion though we all came to: that the Church is diverse in its approach to both evangelism and mode of worship; and although we are all this diverse, unity is not so much lacking as far as doctrine and sound Christian teaching is concerned.
Here below are some of my observations on the Church - of which I am part of;

We mutually wear a certain disguise called "pettiness"
A few weeks ago, we were presented with a controversial discussion on “the Church and Morality” - so to say - as was depicted in a certain poster outside a mega church in Kenya’s capital, Nairobi.

The poster is here below (courtesy of UlizaLinks);

"Blurred Lines" - A sermon series courtesy of Mavuno Church

Many claimed that the poster was very controversial (put "very" in CAPS) (and of course it was controversial) as far as Christian values are/were concerned, condemned it and blatantly claimed that that church’s leadership (Mavuno Church) was misguiding our young people (and of course talking of young people, I should be one of them), and that they should apologize for doing so.

The discussion emanated into 2 weeks of funny internet memes and GIFs, and I am very sure that you either retweeted, commented on, or laughed at all those twerkusifu jokes.

But this was not funny, my friend. It was not.
 
These were serious issues in our society - issues affecting ALL young people - being tackled by the church... Just in a different way altogether...
Okay, I gave my two pence on what I felt (and still feel) about the Mavuno Poster (as it came to be known) and moved on. Some people hated me (“caught feelings”), some supported me, and it went on the way it did... And if you were to tell me right then - and even right now - that Mavuno Church was/is not addressing current challenges amongst young people, (saved or unsaved), I would/ I will drag you to the ground with it...

See, today, I have had a few Christians (including myself) complain about things they see in other Christians - things they think are just wrong. You know it, right? It is a common thing. It mostly has been due to “not liking how the other person is serving God” by claiming that they are not capitalizing on the “basic, major and fundamental parts of the Christian Faith”, or on how bad they are as compared to us.

Note: Differentiate between pettiness and differences in doctrine as in cases when we attack, speak against and refute false teachers, heresies and teachings. In this case, I am talking about our petty reactions towards other normal Christians.

I have been a victim of such accusations. People claim that because I am a leader in many capacities, there are things I should not talk about, and that there are things I should be silent about. Some of these things include; love relationships, politics, humor, commenting on certain TV Shows, current news, affairs and on secular music (although I don’t listen to secular music or have any of it on any of my gadgets).

All these critics claim that I should base my christian influence on teaching Scripture and being the blunt and stoic Christian they are. But in retaliation, I have always asked, “Are we here to only reach out to the saints or also to the unsaved? Is my service to God (including this blog) only meant for the "cherched" or also to the "uncherched”? Why do we like to spiritualize everything? Huh?


If I have to reach out to anyone at all, the tools I may use need to make sense both to the believer (in line with Scripture) and to the unbeliever (for them to gain an understanding of what Christianity is all about.)

People have different needs as far as general life is concerned; some just need encouragement, some need Scripture full time, some need humor, others need music; some seek for news while others are attracted to weirdness. End point? Christ should be preached. Christ should revealed. To all people.
Anyway, am I sinning by doing this, by using all tools available to me to reach out to as many people as possible? No. Okay, does Jesus Christ, my Lord, feel offended when I do it? No. So what? Why do we have to make the Gospel so unreachable and so hard to pursue and love? I love being saved. I love it. I cannot imagine myself without salvation. I want other people to love it through seeing me as I enjoy it. That is all I want - for all people to know the Jesus I know, relate with Him and thereafter come to love Him.
The Mavuno poster unveiled our pettiness - how we choose to react to issues without basing our view on Scripture but on how we feel. When did the Gospel become subject to how we feel and what we think (our opinions)?

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Jesus, in His time, used examples the people around him could relate with so that He would drive his message home. He wanted them to understand Him - to understand the message of the Kingdom in the easiest way possible. The Pharisees called it crazy, but God called it awesome. They called unorthodox, but the Father called it obedience. Note the difference.

The Apostle Paul had “a fight” with the Apostle Peter on this same issue in Galatians Chapter 2 (please read the whole chapter to get what I am saying) when Peter claimed that the Gospel was only to be preached in a certain way and only to the Jews. Paul on the other hand felt that the Gospel was to be preached by all means possible to both Jews and Gentiles. End point? God intervenes in Acts 10 by showing Peter that the Gospel was not limited to the Jews alone but that it was for the Gentiles too, thus justifying what Paul had earlier preached in Romans 9:15 (and what Peter had been knowing all along because it was written in the very Torah he ardently followed - Exodus 33:19 (ESV) “And he said, 'I will make all my goodness pass before you and will proclaim before you my name ‘The LORD.’ And I will be gracious to whom I will be gracious, and will show mercy on whom I will show mercy.'”and in Hosea 2:23 (ESV) “...and I will sow her for myself in the land. And I will have mercy on No Mercy, and I will say to Not My People, ‘You are my people’; and he shall say, ‘You are my God.’”)

The argument between Paul and Peter presents to us what the modern church has become: petty. We have become like the Corinthian church which Paul wrangled with asking them in 1 Corinthians 3:4 (ESV), “For when one says, ‘I follow Paul,’ and another, ‘I follow Apollos,’ are you not being merely human /petty?” (the word 'petty' is my own addition).

My observation is that the greatest opposition the church is facing today is not from the world but from within. We are fighting amongst ourselves more than we are fighting against sin and the many atrocities in the world. Our pettiness - not based on the Holy Scripture - is our spiritual backlog.
We are acting like the fella below that Jesus once talked about

You got a speck in your eye!!

This is how I think we should act around a fellow Christian when they are not doing things the same way we do them (putting in mind that our way of doing things is not law as far as the Spirit of God is concerned.)
We should ask ourselves;

1. Are they sinning? If not, why criticize them?
2. Is what they are doing positively changing someone's life- both in the Church and in the world? If yes, why oppose them?
3. Are they being guided by God in what they are doing? Are they glorifying God? Is the Spirit of God and His Word being involved?  If yes, then why stand against ourselves?

If we were to read and understand the message in Romans Chapter 14, and read it over and over again with an open mind and allow God's Spirit to speak to us, our pettiness would become less and less by the day.

People make mistakes. People sin. You also sin and make mistakes. They need a break. We should give them some breathing space - because we expect the same of ourselves when we err.

Note: These two articles reveal and describe how good we are at being petty: “Why People Really Like Jesus More Than Christians” and “Why I Quit Church (and the Surprise That Brought Me Back)”

Baseless blame games
Then in some other contexts, I have met numerous people (both believers and unbelievers) complaining about Church leadership and how they are falling away from the Church because of leader so-and-so or pastor-so-and-so.
Wait. So people are refusing to be faithful to God on the account of others? Is one's life tagged within another's life? Is spirituality a matter of an individual of a society or of a group? Will I go to heaven because my pastor (or another person's pastor) or leader is going to heaven or on the account of my own life and commitment to God? Why do people blame pastors and/or church leaders for fallen saints or any other sins within a congregation or a given denomination? Are pastors or leaders supposed to be gods so that they may jump like saving angels at some sort of an alarm and save church members from willful sinning?
Okay. Would we blame Jesus Christ for Judas Iscariot’s eloping, greed and love for money? Or blame the apostle Paul for Giaus’s leaving or the apostle John for Deotrephes’s weird mannerisms? Were all these leaders “unspiritual”? that some few people around them fell back and went back into the world? Why then do we call our pastors and leaders "unspiritual" because of some other person's sinful life? Isn't obedience to God's Word an individual's responsibility?

Whenever we blame others and make them responsible for our failures (or other people's failures), we are just being self-righteous, mean, judgmental and self-ish. Leaders and pastors are part of the body of Christ just as we are. They are no better than us. They have just been given a higher office of responsibility as compared to us, but that does not make them immune to sin or to the devil's temptation(s). They experience burn-out and feel weak, exhausted, betrayed and run down just as we often do. We should stop blaming them for all the things we see happening in our congregation(s) and instead pray for/with them. There, we will be part of the solution instead of being part of the problem.
I don't deny that some of them deliberately sin and that others advocate for evil and wicked deeds amongst their followers, but why not pray for them instead? Yeah, we should rebuke them and correct them, but why not pray for them after doing so?
The body of Christ should be able to heal itself through forgiveness, love and prayer; and not tear itself apart through ridicule, factions and slurring...
That's my opinion.


I close my case.

Wait for Part 3 in the near future.


Bonface Morris.

I Have A Type

People interested in how I am doing - relationships-wise and generally in life - have been asking me a lot of questions of late.

These questions have been centered upon current trends in relationships and things like on-line dating (inclusive of social media hookups, stalking and WhatsApp what-nots), having "types" (which is what I am trying to address in this post) and getting the eternally evasive "Mr/Mrs Right".

These are common relationship concerns amongst people of my age, and it is obvious that we cannot (in the widest use of the word) conclusively dissolve them in a few minutes. Nope. They require time, and research, and blabbering (lots of blabbering :-)), and yeah, agreement, in order to get everyone on the same page and drive the point home. Questions on relationships are like thus... (methinks.)

So with the many questions I have been being asked, something came up: types, yeah, types. And in that discussion, we revolved around TV Shows like Tujuane (now being aired on NTV) and Are You My Type (aired on KTN).
I will give you an account of the latter.

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Just the other day, @KTNKenya started airing a dating reality TV Show called "Are You My Type?". The name on its own baffled many and it somehow stirred excitement in all of us - the kind of excitement that is always common amongst middle income Kenyans when new stuff is being introduced on our TV screens. But after the show premiered, and knowing the kind of background our African culture has handed over to us, and that we have not yet fully come to terms with adopting Reality TV Shows or anything close to them, the program has not yet received placable positive feedback (at least from what I gather on various webosphere streets).

@KTNKenya's "Are You My Type?" (#KTNMyType) is aired on Saturdays from 8-9pm, EAT.

Nevertheless, I think the TV Show (or program depending on what you think of it) is still achieving it's goal: bringing in discussions on relationships and dating and whether we can boldly and openly give a portrait of a specific person and the traits we would want to have in a partner or not. It has led to many of us pretending that "we don't have a type" or that "we DO have a type, but it is complicated", and others maintaining that a type is overrated, yet still, others calmly saying that they Do have a type.
This post is part of those discussions.

So, anyway, what is "a type?" 
To me, a type is a preference someone has for someone of the opposite sex based on various habits, character, behavior, personality and values they find [attractive] in the other person. That is a type.

And if that is the correct definition of a type, then I guess I am right to say that we all have types. Right? We all prefer a certain people to others. We all are choosy when it comes to relationships. We would rather hang around a certain league of friends, and not others. We tend to like a certain person more because of who and what they are as perceived by us (whether objectively or impulsively), and not just because they are a person. We all have a type. 

Consider this...

Take for instance, Adrian and James. They are two friends with different tastes (another word that is used alongside a type) in women. Let's say that they both are born again Christians and that they both will have one central criterion in choosing which woman suits their world - a saved lady.

Mmmmhhh... And given that time, opportunity and chance and all the other constraining factors are put at a constant, Adrian, when asked which lady he'd prefer as his woman, will give the following description; saved (as a central factor), beautiful, homely, kind, generous, outgoing, extroverted, sensitive, intuitive and so forth and so on...
On the other hand, when asked, his friend will come up with the following qualities; saved (as a central factor), faithful, introverted, calm, obedient, thoughtful, independent...
Adrian thinks that obedient and introverted women are wimps and, er, douchebags (forgive me for that), but James reiterates that such women are supportive, warmly, encouraging and comforting (considering the kind of work he does...).
You can see that there are a few differences in the choices made by the two about a lady that each would prefer - one which fits in their world, about their type...

Also consider this...

Annabelle and Susan are good friends. They have been friends from five years of age when their families were relocated to the same town and begun living in the same estate. One almost knows what the other may want in life - including men (or so they think.) Both of them are saved ladies, and will both want a saved man (that is their central factor) for a relationship. But when asked, these BFF cannot have the same choice in what they want in that saved man, or any saved man in particular!

Annabelle prefers a man that is tall, yet to Susan, height is not a factor. Annabelle prefers a well groomed man: short hair, fashion-sensitive and savvy (not necessarily formal but cool), with good eye contact, assertive and ambitious and not necessarily wealthy but earning a living and able to take care of her and her babies (yeah, she's already thinking of marriage :-)); but her friend on the other hand prefers a laid back man, well-groomed (and specifically one that loves suits and is formal in his dressing code), educated, ambitious and one who can literally "spoil her with goodies" (wealthy). Annabelle thinks that wealthy men are insensitive, loud-mouthed and braggarts, while her friend denies it and says that such men offer security both to her and to the future family...
The two friends differ in their choice of the kind of man they like.
They have types. 

A type is the key to falling in love.

After the lecture above (which actually is my distorted research), there are a few things we need to understand about having a type;

1. You have a type. He/she exists. Whether saved or not, you have a preferred type of person/spouse you want in your life and not just anyone. No one just fits in your life. No. Your relationship life revolves around picking out people with a certain balance of characteristics and values, so, yes, you have a type. Me too. :-)
2. Neither your friends nor your family conclusively know your type. They may give you suggestions and pointers, but you need to follow your heart/gut. It knows better. Like in the two illustrations above, Adrian cannot choose a lady for James, nor can James do the same for Adrian. The same goes to the ladies. One can give suggestions on what they think can suit the other but it should never be the final word. It will be catastrophic if Annabelle or either of the guys decides to put the future and worth of their relationships in their friend's hands. They'll get lost and end up regretting it in the long run. Why? Because whatever one sees in one person, is never always what the other sees in the same person... We all view and perceive people differently.
3. There are only two people that know your type: you and God, so stick to that script.
4. Sometimes, it is important to give people time. They may become your type, eventually. Don't push people away with so-called "first impressions". They may just have slipped from the norm, so give them time. Note: Remember I said sometimes... not always. Know the difference.
5. What dating (or courtship in Christian circles) does is to help one gauge the other person against various wants and needs they have. Dating/courtship is a selfish (but good way, or woreva way) of sieving amongst many people, in order to get the right type. It is a way of saying, "I am secretly interviewing you for a job, a job of taking care of me and all that I am, and I need you to fit that criterion..." :-)
6. Types are at the center of falling in love. Yes, you heard me right. We fall in love based on how other people make us feel when they are in sync with our love language (I will talk in length about the love language soon.)

Now you know you have a type, and that I have one too. Let's deal with it. We can continue living in denial -  as a way of dealing with it - or we can accept it as it is and be dealing with it too...

So, be it as it may, let's just deal with it anyway.

Until some other time,


Bonface Morris.