 |
| Devil, I ain't my past!! |
Note: This post also provides
answers to “what to do when you feel discouraged because you feel inadequate
(or you feel unworthy) to do something for yourself, for someone else or
for God.”
*******
Some of
us had nasty pasts before getting saved. Really nasty pasts. We did things that
if confessed to the weak-minded, we may end up as trending headlines on gossip
blogs or as fodder for prime time news for days on end. We literally used to
dine with the devil Himself.
But thank
God, we've been redeemed. We are not who we used to be anymore. We are changed.
We are now sons and daughters of the Most High God:
“But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were
justified in the Name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.” (1 Corinthians 6:11, ESV)
But this
does not hold back the devil from tormenting us. I am sure that Moses (from the
Old Testament) and the apostle Paul (from the New Testament) fell victim to
these games by the devil from time to time. The former was a murderer while the
latter was a persecutor, an accuser and a tormentor of the church.
I always
try to imagine of the conversations the devil used to probably create in Paul’s
mind from time to time when Paul thought about receiving the crown of
eternal glory from Christ Himself when he reaches Heaven. Yes people, this
may be true because we have never really figured out what Paul’s “thorn” was
(read 2 Corinthians Chapter 12 to
get the whole story.)
Below is
an imaginary clip from what the devil may have been lying to Paul about when he
reaches Heaven:
[This scene is in Heaven and Paul the apostle, a dedicated
servant of God, is smiling and just about to receive his crown when Stephen,
the first martyr of the Early Church who is behind him pats him on the back]
Stephen: "Hello man! Do I know you from somewhere? I think
I know you! [Ponderous pause] [While pointing and shaking his index finger, he
continues...] Yes! You are one of those guys who falsely accused me and then
ceremoniously watched me get stoned, right?"
Paul: “I’m sorry man. That was the old me. This is the new me. I
am changed man. I even wrote about it in 2 Corinthians 5:17.”
Stephen: Just for the sake of knowing man, how did it feel Paul?
How did it feel killing an innocent person?"
Paul: *Silence*
Awkward
moments, those ones. (And that is why I am always inclined to call Paul “the
apostle to Christian misfits/anomalies.”) The apostle Paul really knew
something about being rejected because of your past. Read all his letters and
you'll figure it out almost in each one of them that he lived with the reality
of rejection because of his nasty past...
And many
of us feel the same way almost all the time. There are these moments when we
are feeling glorious and are celebrating doing something for God or for a
fellow man and we are just rejoicing in who we have become; then the enemy,
that tormentor of brethren, brings back the bad old memories and starts
haunting our minds with thoughts of who we used to be. He then goes further and
awakens us to the reality of how awkward it would be if we met the same people
we wronged or the people who wronged us and we answered back with nasty
revenge. He leaves us helpless and guilty, defenseless and self-accusing. He
steals our joy and our peace and we are left empty, feeling hopeless, useless
and even contemplating suicide.
There are
two things we need to realize though at these moments of torment: that the
battle the devil is trying to fight is;
(a) Mostly in our minds and it can only be won in the mind. If we change the way we think about and view ourselves, there is nothing more he can do to us.
(b) Against our personalities: people with weak personalities will always fall vulnerable to the devil's tactics and attacks.
Below, I
am listing two main weapons the enemy uses to torment us and how to deal with
each:
1. Weapon:
people.
The devil
uses self-righteous people to tell us that we are not worthy and that we are
going to fail. They come to make us guilty of a past we have already dealt with
- a past God has already forgiven us of. They come
to pierce thorns in old wounds and to terrify us concerning the future. These
people are always those who know you well from your past – a past you can’t
undo.
Solution:
a) Keep
quiet. Sometimes all that is required of us is to shut up. Say
nothing. This is because the more we defend ourselves before self-righteous
people, the worse it becomes. There are times to talk, but not to
self-righteous people. You can’t correct a Pharisee. You can’t argue with
self-righteous people. They are not going to change what they think about you
and who you are right now. The best thing is to talk to God so that He may give
you the grace to live with these people. Avoiding them won’t solve a thing,
what you need is patience and tolerance; and these we can always get in good
supply from God’s Spirit if we decide to tap from His power.
b) Face them
and tell them that you are not who you used to be. Tell
them that it's true that you were that way in the past, but you are different
now.
This
point does not contradict the first one. It only applies in
instances when the Spirit of God whispers to you: “Morris, tell them
that who you are right now is not who you used to be in the past.”
c) You
cannot undo your past, so always pray to God to give you strength to live with
its realities and consequences. Running away from our
pasts is not possible, but learning to live with their consequences is a daily
journey. And God is able to help us all the way through. Sometimes, these
moments act as a good place to have intimacy with God rather than running away
from Him. Remember that He is the only help you got when everyone else seems to
be against you. Run to God, not away from Him. He holds nothing against you:
“He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor
repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above
the earth, so great is His steadfast love toward those who fear Him; as
far as the east is from the west, so far does He remove our transgressions from
us. (Psalms 103:10-12, ESV)
God has
nothing against you.
“Who shall bring any charge against God's elect? It is
God who justifies. Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who
died - more than that, who was raised - who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is
interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall
tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger,
or sword? (Rom 8:33-35, ESV)
2. Weapon:
our minds.
As I
mentioned earlier, the battle is in our minds and against our personalities.
The enemy uses our minds to hit against us. What we allow our minds to think
about who we are right now when the devil attacks is exactly who we become. If
we think we are who we used to be, that is exactly what we will become... until
we counter those thoughts with the Word of God. This means that we can wallow
in self-pity for as long we allow it to happen. We are the only ones who hold
the key to setting us free. God has already played His part by promising us
quite a number of things and telling us exactly who He knows we have now
become. It is up to us to believe what He says concerning us.
Solution:
a) Bring the
fight back to him (the devil). Ask him, "So
what?" Tell him: "I am new now. I am changed. My past is
all forgotten in the eyes of the One who redeemed me. I am neither condemnable
by you nor by your agents." (Romans 8:1.) Remind him of who God is
to you, what He has done to your life and where you are headed in Him. Use
Scripture and the armor of God to
overcome him.
b) Remind
yourself who you are right now in Christ:
“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new
creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” (2 Corinthians 5:17, ESV)
“But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy
nation, a people for His own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies
of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light.” (1 Peter 2:9, ESV)
“No, in all these things we are more than conquerors
through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor
life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor
height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate
us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8:37-39, ESV)
c)
Renew your thinking: start thinking about yourself the way God
thinks about you (by commanding your thoughts through His Word) and
not through what people, the devil or even yourself think you are. Rise up every
day when the enemy and his agents attack you and command your mind to
believe what God says about you and not what you or people think you
are. The apostle Paul, who I know knew exactly what it means to be
tormented in the mind says this about thinking:
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is
honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is
commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise,
think about these things." (Philippians 4:8, ESV).
I
hope this will be helpful in overcoming the accuser of brethren the next time he comes knocking at your doorstep.
Bonface Morris.
