Argument is not that easy. It is even harder when there is a lot of disagreement. Although relativism concludes that absoluteness of fact is not achievable, and there is only a ‘most probable truth’, there is no way conclusions can exist unless we agree to one code of operation. Even absolute terms in a fact (what we love calling ‘the dogma’), has to face argument for it to qualify (at least for those supporting it) to be Truth in its infallibility.
World philosophies have upped their game of dialectics. Philosophy has become the common food of the intellectual person. It has put the entire globe on the edge of intellectual anticipation and value systems that are warping towards it. Malcolm Muggarage (one of my favorites) writes and says, “We have educated ourselves into imbecility”. I think that’s why our parents fear that we should go to school and ‘read too much’; and it may be the reason for such a verse as Ecclesiastes 12:12, NET BIBLE
(Be warned, my son, of anything in addition to them. There is no end to the making of many books, and much study is exhausting to the body).
But men should argue. They should reason. They should argue and reason constructively. Even God reasons… (Isaiah 1:18, NKJV, “...Come now, let us reason together, says the LORD...”). Men and God reason because by reasoning, the mind’s explosive capabilities are either intuitively or exponentially run into… We can say that reason helps in the dialysis of facts. Reason is the best way to abstractly define or defend a belief. It may not be the only way, but by it the values, likes and dislikes of an oral being are thoroughly explored. It helps us define assumptions, state fears, make our inventions understood and… just talk. It may bring strife but that is what communication always breeds – a war or a peace… So, although all men have the freedom of opinion and the right to reasoning, we just have as less freedom to choose the subjects of those opinions (or reasons if to say) as we have on the decisions that are the aftermath of the same – mainly searching through the recipients and gaging their ability to see through each opinion or reason...
I’ll make it simpler for you…
Atheists have their own opinion on the existence of God. They say there is no God. Strong as it may seem, it is their choice. It is their dogma. Their opium of the mind. They believe that in saying so, many can believe in their opinion. They believe that you should believe them and later believe in them because they believe in nothing… And that the nothing they believe IN is the ultimate cause of all belief and thus should be the object of every other belief… including yours and mine…. And there are many more who believe in humanism, naturalism, existentialism, realism... the list of modern philosophies is endless…
Basically (and for the sake of this post) I will slightly address the belief held by Gnostics. Don’t be scared of the many stupid titles here and there… it is philosophy anyway…
The gnostics believe that a person cannot have true knowledge about the existence of God; and that although they acknowledge there being a God, they don’t deny the possibility of His non-existence... To them, God’s existence is not a problem, the problem is them believing that He can become flesh and still be God… They believe that God eternally exists only as a spirit and can never be flesh; and that Jesus was not a man at all but a man-God… bla, bla, bla… It is here where I find a problem with negative philosophy and the Gnostic culture. Ouch! I’ll have to run through the basics of this negative philosophy some other time…
But on the other side of the philosophical-and-spiritual debate, the Apostle John (that great teacher who with strong statements defends the course of his belief in Christ – his Lord, cousin and best friend – says that He saw and TOUCHED HIM [which we have seen with our eyes, which we have looked at and our hands have touched – 1 John 1:1] and that [the Word became flesh… John 1:14]) has words to speak about and against Gnostism and all its branches…
The apostle John cooks us through a momentum of mind stirring battles between Truth and a philosophy of his day (which by the way was not called Gnostism then). He openly displays the fallacy that many Gregorian (and together with Jewish) believers had fallen into due to the love of philosophy as opposed to the love of Truth. That’s why you hear him mention truth in both contexts of the scripture quoted above (if you read the whole text)…
And as Christians, we are tempted to improvise Christianity in order to run in line with modernization. We are tempted to topple Christianity into the communization that is globalism. Do you ever wonder where such religions as Mormonism, New Age and Scientology came from? It was out of desire to make Christianity a globally acceptable religion; a desire to conquer over the scam that are the wrangles between Christianity and its immediate environment anywhere…
We find out that maybe through reasoning, we will define to them (the world and the philosophies therein) why we think they should acknowledge the presence of a supernatural power that eternally exists and eternally controls the universe. Gnostics (even from the time of John the Apostle) believe Christ was not fully human, and that He was a spirit being with a body-like form that was not corruptible... and that we mortals are not capable of reaching that perfection in our ‘weakness’... but the basis of reasoning or argument will be as a tool that will enable is to reach a consensus with them. That consensus will not be by compromise but just like John, through exposing Truth. Truth and only Truth will define to them who Christ really is and what He really desires of them… We as independent Christians choose not to accept others’ views on certain matters concerning belief just as we choose to say, ‘Yes’. Having good reason (and good in this case is not relative) is a keystone factor.
C. S. Lewis in Mere Christianity talks about The Law of Human Nature. He says that his arguments are not a platform for promoting one denomination within Christianity over another but rather an aid to assist in making rightful choices. And the act of making rightful choices he says, in his introduction, is like a hall where we all enter and ‘reason within ourselves’ as to which door to knock and later open…
Just like we reason over facts with men, let us reason over Truth with God and men… so that as many as there are in world philosophies, so should there be in the Truth of God…
Sincerely,
Morris.
Thursday, May 31, 2012
Friday, May 25, 2012
Has "Modern Worship" Become Corrupt?
This article was used with permission from Kim Gentes (www.kimgentes.com)
Have We Lost The Heart of Modern Worship, Are Things as Pure as They Once Where? or Has "Modern Worship" Become Corrupt?
In the early days of praise and worship growing up in the church, it was popular for "defenders of the faith" (those who preferred the established style of music at the time) to attack the new style because they said it lacked substance, and pandered to the culture. Over the years, this criticism actually helped make modern worship songs become better theological representations of Christian teaching. The arguments about style eventually waned and died when clear-headed adults realized that musical style has almost no relevance in a theological instrument. "Let everything that has breath praise the Lord", at least that is what David said. What was David's point? Simply this- no matter the instrument, the sound, the form or even person, the call remains the same "praise the Lord". Simply review Psalms 148-150 and you begin to see that God is calling us to praise Him regardless of our place in life (Psalm 148:11,12), regardless of the art form (dance or music - Psalm 149:3), regardless of the instrument (Psalm 149:3-5), even regardless of whether you are a human, angelic being or just a part of creation (Psalm 148:1-12). So while the "worship wars" may have happened in our churches for the last 30 years, it became obvious that David probably had won the argument about format a good 3000 years before we started discussing it in the 20th century- Let everything that has breathe praise the Lord!
But no sooner had the "old" vs "new" fight subsided, than we began to hear rumblings about the "corruption" of modern worship. After 30 years of infancy, its growth into adolescence was met by some amount of disdain by a good group of its progenitors. The original "guard" that was around when praise and worship burst on the church was now becoming vocal about the ongoing change that continued to propel the stylistic growth of the music. But more than just that, there was a "we told you so" attitude developing that began to expound the idea that the community of practitioners was now becoming enamored with the commercialization of the musical genre that had grown up around the music. In other words you could hear this said in a thousand different ways from some people- "this modern worship isn't as pure and humble as the original stuff". Also there is the idea that "worship leaders are just trying to become artists with record deals".
You could tack on a hundred variations to those two previous statements, but most often they boil down to those ideas.
So, let's talk about it. Is "modern worship" corrupt?
I'll answer that with another question. Is Christianity corrupt?
I think the truth is that you have to say both no and yes. For the most part, honest followers of Jesus are not bent on corruption of their faith or others. Also within the community of honest followers of Jesus, there are those who are (to varying degrees) corrupted by painful, sad choices and poor character. And finally, there are those who are actually apostates- people who willfully seek false doctrines for their own selfish motivations. Christians- the community of those who declare themselves to be honest followers of Jesus- I believe are not largely corrupt. They are instead, redeemed, and indeed, being more redeemed as they apply their lives to His guidance and instruction. Yet, they are still humans living on earth and are subject to brokenness. So there will always (until He returns) be a schismed vision of the Body of Christ- one which portrays a Bride to which Christ will return. And yet still, one that is in need of His continuing and ongoing work of purification, renewal and mercy. We are redeemed, but in daily need of a tethered existence to His faithful mercy for our lives.
So if this is the place we find ourselves with our existence as a Christian community, what can we say about "modern worship"?
Personally, I don't think "modern worship" is any more tragically perverted than anything else in "Christiandom". And the same arguments that I applied above apply to those involved in worship ministry today. On the whole, I believe we have a worship community within Christiandom that is sincerely devoted to Christ and seeks Godly goals in their work within the community of bringing forth praise and worship.
Often times I hear people getting negative as though they are hoping for some "good old days" of worship. It seems people love to jump on the bandwagon of bashing worship these days because they perceive its gone so commercial. Is there a misconception and excess now that has grown up with the creation of an "industry"? Sure there is! But frankly, that has existed in Christian preaching and leadership for years. The same is true of CCM (contemporary Christian music), television personalities, and healing/deliverance ministries. Did we throw them out as wholly "abhorrent"? No! Instead, we learned to weed out the good from bad.
To me, it comes down to each person, each church, each song and each worshiper. As we talk, look, listen and encounter them one at a time, we find a whole different story. When I look at each person and situation, and stop generalizing, and talk to individuals and churches (or investigate specific songs), I find something surprising. The devotion, the heart, the desire and the humility far outweigh the excess. And the devotional pulse of the local congregations is more, not less, participative in the gathered worship times than it has been in decades. Only 30 years ago the gathered church sang songs that almost NEVER spoke intimately with God, now its normative. Wow. That alone is a significant change.
Is it perfect? Is it the ultimate? By no means. Do we need more authenticity and more foundational return to cultivating Biblical consistency mixed with relevant language in our song vocabulary? Absolutely! Can we keep working on humbly following God in all this, without mixed agendas? No doubt.
Should we worry about our young leaders pursuing "music careers" because an industry has grown up around "worship" that has provided a few people with occupations? How sad if we fixate on that.
First, as far as an "industry", we don't have to worry there. The Christian (and worship) music "industry" is practically vaporised. Today, whether you have a real ministry from God in worship, or an imagined one from vanity, your chances of "making it" are about 0.000833%. Seriously. Because of the 120 million people who claim to be Christians in the US (and that is being very generous, since we know that many people don't actually go to church!), only a few hundred of those actually make their living as bonafide, full-time, Christian musicians and artists who work in the "music industry". The point is this- the industry is not just small, it is minuscule. Additionally, it is shrinking at an alarming rate in due no small part to the collapse of the commercial music model at the hands of the internet age. No one is making a living in music these days unless they are providing something real-- like the ability to actually perform live music, a gifting to truly minister in a local church, a heart to genuinely care for people. For all intents and purposes, selling "product" is dead. CDs don't sell, and only 1 in 20 downloads of music are legal. Illegal stealing of music (Christians included) has destroyed the music industry. What remains are simply people and God's gifts on them. If that is not a return to reality I don't know what is.
Should we teach young leaders to not fixate and seek a musical career of "glory" at the expense of a contrite devotional heart? Obviously we should teach them. But to judge "modern worship" as corrupt is as short sighted as the praise and worship naysayers 30 years ago because it lays on the heads of every Christian, musician and worshiper a judgement that really only applies to a very, very small minority of hurting people who are looking inappropriately to follow a misguided sense of ministry by relying on a worship industry to make them famous as they "serve God".
Is there a place for talented young musicians, writers and leaders? Yes there is! Because while there are a tiny number of "jobs" in the Christian music industry, there are literally tens of thousands of jobs for good musicians, leaders and songwriters. "Where?", you ask. We call them music ministers, worship leaders and choir directors. They are needed and employable in a place called the local church. Should their gifting and exceptional songwriting prove encouraging to their local church, other churches may benefit from it. Should other churches be built up by it and tell others, then eventually that gifting may open up invitation and opportunity for that person to minister in an ever widening scope of local churches. At some point that gifting will carry that person into an industry where they may, for a time, bless an entire nation through God's blessing on their lives in music. Do we look down on the ones who come and go through an "industry" because it suits our need to criticize? Or do we disdain them because it wasn't us? Are there some that have tainted motives? Do we have tainted motives? I think we all know that there will always be something of a mixture in anything we seek to do that is virtuous. But as we surrender to God, He is faithful and just to work on our hearts in it all.
And while we will do well to surrender our hearts to his cleansing, purifying work of the Holy Spirit, why don't we also trust that He will do His work in the hearts of those others we are concerned about, who happen to be the current artists, worship leaders and songwriters of "modern worship"?
Perhaps the challenge is all of ours then, to be open hearts instead of pointing fingers.
Used with permission from Kim Anthony Gentes, a worship leader, songwriter, recording artist and freelance writer (C)Copyright 2009 Kim Anthony Gentes, Website: www.kimgentes.com.
Sincerely,
Morris.
Have We Lost The Heart of Modern Worship, Are Things as Pure as They Once Where? or Has "Modern Worship" Become Corrupt?
In the early days of praise and worship growing up in the church, it was popular for "defenders of the faith" (those who preferred the established style of music at the time) to attack the new style because they said it lacked substance, and pandered to the culture. Over the years, this criticism actually helped make modern worship songs become better theological representations of Christian teaching. The arguments about style eventually waned and died when clear-headed adults realized that musical style has almost no relevance in a theological instrument. "Let everything that has breath praise the Lord", at least that is what David said. What was David's point? Simply this- no matter the instrument, the sound, the form or even person, the call remains the same "praise the Lord". Simply review Psalms 148-150 and you begin to see that God is calling us to praise Him regardless of our place in life (Psalm 148:11,12), regardless of the art form (dance or music - Psalm 149:3), regardless of the instrument (Psalm 149:3-5), even regardless of whether you are a human, angelic being or just a part of creation (Psalm 148:1-12). So while the "worship wars" may have happened in our churches for the last 30 years, it became obvious that David probably had won the argument about format a good 3000 years before we started discussing it in the 20th century- Let everything that has breathe praise the Lord!
But no sooner had the "old" vs "new" fight subsided, than we began to hear rumblings about the "corruption" of modern worship. After 30 years of infancy, its growth into adolescence was met by some amount of disdain by a good group of its progenitors. The original "guard" that was around when praise and worship burst on the church was now becoming vocal about the ongoing change that continued to propel the stylistic growth of the music. But more than just that, there was a "we told you so" attitude developing that began to expound the idea that the community of practitioners was now becoming enamored with the commercialization of the musical genre that had grown up around the music. In other words you could hear this said in a thousand different ways from some people- "this modern worship isn't as pure and humble as the original stuff". Also there is the idea that "worship leaders are just trying to become artists with record deals".
You could tack on a hundred variations to those two previous statements, but most often they boil down to those ideas.
So, let's talk about it. Is "modern worship" corrupt?
I'll answer that with another question. Is Christianity corrupt?
I think the truth is that you have to say both no and yes. For the most part, honest followers of Jesus are not bent on corruption of their faith or others. Also within the community of honest followers of Jesus, there are those who are (to varying degrees) corrupted by painful, sad choices and poor character. And finally, there are those who are actually apostates- people who willfully seek false doctrines for their own selfish motivations. Christians- the community of those who declare themselves to be honest followers of Jesus- I believe are not largely corrupt. They are instead, redeemed, and indeed, being more redeemed as they apply their lives to His guidance and instruction. Yet, they are still humans living on earth and are subject to brokenness. So there will always (until He returns) be a schismed vision of the Body of Christ- one which portrays a Bride to which Christ will return. And yet still, one that is in need of His continuing and ongoing work of purification, renewal and mercy. We are redeemed, but in daily need of a tethered existence to His faithful mercy for our lives.
So if this is the place we find ourselves with our existence as a Christian community, what can we say about "modern worship"?
Personally, I don't think "modern worship" is any more tragically perverted than anything else in "Christiandom". And the same arguments that I applied above apply to those involved in worship ministry today. On the whole, I believe we have a worship community within Christiandom that is sincerely devoted to Christ and seeks Godly goals in their work within the community of bringing forth praise and worship.
Often times I hear people getting negative as though they are hoping for some "good old days" of worship. It seems people love to jump on the bandwagon of bashing worship these days because they perceive its gone so commercial. Is there a misconception and excess now that has grown up with the creation of an "industry"? Sure there is! But frankly, that has existed in Christian preaching and leadership for years. The same is true of CCM (contemporary Christian music), television personalities, and healing/deliverance ministries. Did we throw them out as wholly "abhorrent"? No! Instead, we learned to weed out the good from bad.
To me, it comes down to each person, each church, each song and each worshiper. As we talk, look, listen and encounter them one at a time, we find a whole different story. When I look at each person and situation, and stop generalizing, and talk to individuals and churches (or investigate specific songs), I find something surprising. The devotion, the heart, the desire and the humility far outweigh the excess. And the devotional pulse of the local congregations is more, not less, participative in the gathered worship times than it has been in decades. Only 30 years ago the gathered church sang songs that almost NEVER spoke intimately with God, now its normative. Wow. That alone is a significant change.
Is it perfect? Is it the ultimate? By no means. Do we need more authenticity and more foundational return to cultivating Biblical consistency mixed with relevant language in our song vocabulary? Absolutely! Can we keep working on humbly following God in all this, without mixed agendas? No doubt.
Should we worry about our young leaders pursuing "music careers" because an industry has grown up around "worship" that has provided a few people with occupations? How sad if we fixate on that.
First, as far as an "industry", we don't have to worry there. The Christian (and worship) music "industry" is practically vaporised. Today, whether you have a real ministry from God in worship, or an imagined one from vanity, your chances of "making it" are about 0.000833%. Seriously. Because of the 120 million people who claim to be Christians in the US (and that is being very generous, since we know that many people don't actually go to church!), only a few hundred of those actually make their living as bonafide, full-time, Christian musicians and artists who work in the "music industry". The point is this- the industry is not just small, it is minuscule. Additionally, it is shrinking at an alarming rate in due no small part to the collapse of the commercial music model at the hands of the internet age. No one is making a living in music these days unless they are providing something real-- like the ability to actually perform live music, a gifting to truly minister in a local church, a heart to genuinely care for people. For all intents and purposes, selling "product" is dead. CDs don't sell, and only 1 in 20 downloads of music are legal. Illegal stealing of music (Christians included) has destroyed the music industry. What remains are simply people and God's gifts on them. If that is not a return to reality I don't know what is.
Should we teach young leaders to not fixate and seek a musical career of "glory" at the expense of a contrite devotional heart? Obviously we should teach them. But to judge "modern worship" as corrupt is as short sighted as the praise and worship naysayers 30 years ago because it lays on the heads of every Christian, musician and worshiper a judgement that really only applies to a very, very small minority of hurting people who are looking inappropriately to follow a misguided sense of ministry by relying on a worship industry to make them famous as they "serve God".
Is there a place for talented young musicians, writers and leaders? Yes there is! Because while there are a tiny number of "jobs" in the Christian music industry, there are literally tens of thousands of jobs for good musicians, leaders and songwriters. "Where?", you ask. We call them music ministers, worship leaders and choir directors. They are needed and employable in a place called the local church. Should their gifting and exceptional songwriting prove encouraging to their local church, other churches may benefit from it. Should other churches be built up by it and tell others, then eventually that gifting may open up invitation and opportunity for that person to minister in an ever widening scope of local churches. At some point that gifting will carry that person into an industry where they may, for a time, bless an entire nation through God's blessing on their lives in music. Do we look down on the ones who come and go through an "industry" because it suits our need to criticize? Or do we disdain them because it wasn't us? Are there some that have tainted motives? Do we have tainted motives? I think we all know that there will always be something of a mixture in anything we seek to do that is virtuous. But as we surrender to God, He is faithful and just to work on our hearts in it all.
And while we will do well to surrender our hearts to his cleansing, purifying work of the Holy Spirit, why don't we also trust that He will do His work in the hearts of those others we are concerned about, who happen to be the current artists, worship leaders and songwriters of "modern worship"?
Perhaps the challenge is all of ours then, to be open hearts instead of pointing fingers.
Used with permission from Kim Anthony Gentes, a worship leader, songwriter, recording artist and freelance writer (C)Copyright 2009 Kim Anthony Gentes, Website: www.kimgentes.com.
Sincerely,
Morris.
Thursday, May 17, 2012
There She Stands
I dare look at her,
She dares to look into my eyes,
I dare dance to the song of her presence,
To the sound of her image in the realms of my eyes,
There she stands - like she needs a lullaby to sooth her into the night;
There she stands,
I dare touch her skin,
And the carving of her chin,
I dare look at her big eyes, like doves in the airs of my privacy,
I hold my breath because she almost takes it away,
As she stands there, she almost breaks and pounds me into human pie;
From afar I can smell her skin,
Her fragrance is the power of hypnosis,
It is the aroma of love – of something words can’t describe,
I’ve told her this before but she coiled in disbelief - like it was word-frying,
But her lovely hands, and her voice, and her just standing there,
Kills the strengths out of me – it drains me of my many words,
Her standing there is a commotion of thoughts within my mind...;
There she stands,
Like she wanna move,
And like she don’t wanna move anymore,
Like she wanna trace my every feeling and laugh it off,
And like she gonna conquer my every world, my every peace...
And I’m staring at her,
Her picture sticking in my mind,
First slowly, then vividly, then rapidly...
She is more than a piece of art?!
She is more than a masterpiece – she yields one like herself!
As she stands, I forget my words around,
I look, I search for them furiously,
And I wanna get up and talk,
But with bold sweetness,
And with stillness,
Sing them,
Silently...
I whisper myself into her ears,
Into the ears of her heart,
Into her world,
Singing them,
Silently...
NB: I know you are reading this. These words are for you...
Sincerely,
Morris.
She dares to look into my eyes,
I dare dance to the song of her presence,
To the sound of her image in the realms of my eyes,
There she stands - like she needs a lullaby to sooth her into the night;
There she stands,
I dare touch her skin,
And the carving of her chin,
I dare look at her big eyes, like doves in the airs of my privacy,
I hold my breath because she almost takes it away,
As she stands there, she almost breaks and pounds me into human pie;
From afar I can smell her skin,
Her fragrance is the power of hypnosis,
It is the aroma of love – of something words can’t describe,
I’ve told her this before but she coiled in disbelief - like it was word-frying,
But her lovely hands, and her voice, and her just standing there,
Kills the strengths out of me – it drains me of my many words,
Her standing there is a commotion of thoughts within my mind...;
There she stands,
Like she wanna move,
And like she don’t wanna move anymore,
Like she wanna trace my every feeling and laugh it off,
And like she gonna conquer my every world, my every peace...
And I’m staring at her,
Her picture sticking in my mind,
First slowly, then vividly, then rapidly...
She is more than a piece of art?!
She is more than a masterpiece – she yields one like herself!
As she stands, I forget my words around,
I look, I search for them furiously,
And I wanna get up and talk,
But with bold sweetness,
And with stillness,
Sing them,
Silently...
I whisper myself into her ears,
Into the ears of her heart,
Into her world,
Singing them,
Silently...
NB: I know you are reading this. These words are for you...
Sincerely,
Morris.
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
Dear Mama... I Love You
I just added one more year to those I already have the other day,
And I couldn’t help imagining how much it has cost you caring for me to this day,
I couldn’t imagine the best gift to give to you except a moment of gratitude,
And passages that express my heart – passages that show just how much I appreciate...
I know I have grown older now
I know I am no longer that boy of yours
That small boy who used to weep as you wipe his tears
Yeah, that boy who used to do the stupid things you always forgave...
I have grown to know the world a little bit more
And I have grown to know that what I’m writing is what I feel
I have grown to know how to express my fears, my feelings and my desires
But no longer to you but to God and some other very close friend...
I have grown a little bit more mum, but I’m still that small boy you used to see years ago...
And I will tell of the story of your love for me...
You remember my filthy behaviours, don’t you?
You remember when Dad (I salute you old chap) used to chase me around, don’t you?
You remember when he spanked me for stealing and I would throw words at him, right?
You remember when I used to be the innocent thief, huh?
You remember when one day I run Dad through terrain and he fell down, and I rejoiced that he didn’t catch me, and I went off and slept elsewhere and left you worrying?
You remember when you went out looking for me but couldn’t find me, yet I was only 10?
You remember that my naughtiness got you worried all the time when I disappeared and told all my cousins not to tell you where I was?
I know you remember so many things
I know you remember when after school you told me to go to church and I locked myself in my room pretending not to want to talk to anyone,
I know you remember that I didn’t really love church that much in those days...
I know you remember when the landlord came and we had no money to pay him and he spoke to you words that got to me and I felt like I wanna...
I know you remember when I felt like I wanted to kill that dude who impregnated my beautiful sister, right?
But you tolerated me, you held me
When Dad said I won’t eat because of my thievery, you stole food for me
I could see how sorry you were right there in your eyes when I bathed cold water in the rains as Dad (not hard feelings old chap) watched me shiver
I saw how worried you were when I was told I won’t spend the night in the house because of my erroneous behaviours
I heard you pray for me early in the morning and late into the night...
I miss those moments when I could hear you mention each of my siblings’ names (plus that of papa) in prayer to God
I remember I was terrified that God would hear you and change me (because I somehow enjoyed who I was then)
I miss those moments when you would return from your long journeys and cook us our sweetest meals (you always seemed to understand what each one of us liked)
I miss those moments when I used to bring you the ugali cooking stick in the kitchen when the water was already boiling...
I miss those celebrations when your friends came around in the weekend
I remember the noise, the ululations, the food, the joy, the fervency
I remember the laughter, the earnestness, the speeches, the life...
I miss them...
Mum, you are one of a kind
Yeah mum, you are a woman of a kind
Some of these guys that are reading this letter don’t know you
They have never seen you or heard you talk
But I know you mum; and I know you are a woman of a kind...
And I’m gonna write to say that I love you
I love you because I know when I needed/need you most, you are present
I know you still care for me as much as you did when I was a child
That you wish I could grow small again so that you embrace me with fondness
But I have now grown up and I need to be the man you taught me to become...
God has taught me many more lessons in this life
Life itself has taught me so much – and I’m still learning
But I won’t forget the first lessons you taught me when I was still rebellious
Yeah, I won’t forget the lessons you taught me when I was still like, “Ta tat a ta”
Those were and still are extraordinary lessons
Thank you mum... I love you;
I know that as I am growing older, you too are growing older
But I pray that God will preserve you (and Dad) much more
I pray (just as you pray for each of us every day) that you may prosper
And that my kids will see their granny for many more days...
Mum, I love you...
Sincerely,
Your son Morris.
And I couldn’t help imagining how much it has cost you caring for me to this day,
I couldn’t imagine the best gift to give to you except a moment of gratitude,
And passages that express my heart – passages that show just how much I appreciate...
I know I have grown older now
I know I am no longer that boy of yours
That small boy who used to weep as you wipe his tears
Yeah, that boy who used to do the stupid things you always forgave...
I have grown to know the world a little bit more
And I have grown to know that what I’m writing is what I feel
I have grown to know how to express my fears, my feelings and my desires
But no longer to you but to God and some other very close friend...
I have grown a little bit more mum, but I’m still that small boy you used to see years ago...
And I will tell of the story of your love for me...
You remember my filthy behaviours, don’t you?
You remember when Dad (I salute you old chap) used to chase me around, don’t you?
You remember when he spanked me for stealing and I would throw words at him, right?
You remember when I used to be the innocent thief, huh?
You remember when one day I run Dad through terrain and he fell down, and I rejoiced that he didn’t catch me, and I went off and slept elsewhere and left you worrying?
You remember when you went out looking for me but couldn’t find me, yet I was only 10?
You remember that my naughtiness got you worried all the time when I disappeared and told all my cousins not to tell you where I was?
I know you remember so many things
I know you remember when after school you told me to go to church and I locked myself in my room pretending not to want to talk to anyone,
I know you remember that I didn’t really love church that much in those days...
I know you remember when the landlord came and we had no money to pay him and he spoke to you words that got to me and I felt like I wanna...
I know you remember when I felt like I wanted to kill that dude who impregnated my beautiful sister, right?
But you tolerated me, you held me
When Dad said I won’t eat because of my thievery, you stole food for me
I could see how sorry you were right there in your eyes when I bathed cold water in the rains as Dad (not hard feelings old chap) watched me shiver
I saw how worried you were when I was told I won’t spend the night in the house because of my erroneous behaviours
I heard you pray for me early in the morning and late into the night...
I miss those moments when I could hear you mention each of my siblings’ names (plus that of papa) in prayer to God
I remember I was terrified that God would hear you and change me (because I somehow enjoyed who I was then)
I miss those moments when you would return from your long journeys and cook us our sweetest meals (you always seemed to understand what each one of us liked)
I miss those moments when I used to bring you the ugali cooking stick in the kitchen when the water was already boiling...
I miss those celebrations when your friends came around in the weekend
I remember the noise, the ululations, the food, the joy, the fervency
I remember the laughter, the earnestness, the speeches, the life...
I miss them...
Mum, you are one of a kind
Yeah mum, you are a woman of a kind
Some of these guys that are reading this letter don’t know you
They have never seen you or heard you talk
But I know you mum; and I know you are a woman of a kind...
And I’m gonna write to say that I love you
I love you because I know when I needed/need you most, you are present
I know you still care for me as much as you did when I was a child
That you wish I could grow small again so that you embrace me with fondness
But I have now grown up and I need to be the man you taught me to become...
God has taught me many more lessons in this life
Life itself has taught me so much – and I’m still learning
But I won’t forget the first lessons you taught me when I was still rebellious
Yeah, I won’t forget the lessons you taught me when I was still like, “Ta tat a ta”
Those were and still are extraordinary lessons
Thank you mum... I love you;
I know that as I am growing older, you too are growing older
But I pray that God will preserve you (and Dad) much more
I pray (just as you pray for each of us every day) that you may prosper
And that my kids will see their granny for many more days...
Mum, I love you...
Sincerely,
Your son Morris.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
Love Like the Wind
Like a gem that is desire,
Like a flame that is the fire,
Like the swooping of an emotional umpire,
Love should be like the wind;
Like a touch that has an invincible effect,
Like a dream in a night – a dream without defect,
Like a presence that is immortally intact,
Love is like the wind;
Like a miracle, like a symphony from afar,
Like a song, like a melody that can never deter,
Like an endless life, like an angel’s avatar,
Love should be like the wind;
Like timelessness,
Like neverthelessness,
Like meekness,
Like fearlessness,
Love is like the wind...
Love should be as sure as the rising sun, and as pure as the wind,
Love should be as fond as the breaking of dawn, and as faithful as God,
Love is like the whisper of wind,
Love is like the power of the wind,
Love is the urge to move thenceforth when nothing else does,
And just like the wind, to overcome the urge of being as everything else does,
Love goes beyond doors, it pushes through the beyonds,
Love conquers, love soars, it rises above the beyonds,
Love imparts, love cares, it matches deeper than the beyonds,
Love rises just above the winds – just like the winds...
Love should caress our souls just like the wind,
Love should be available just like the wind...
Yeah, love like the wind...
Love should be like the wind...
Morris.
Like a flame that is the fire,
Like the swooping of an emotional umpire,
Love should be like the wind;
Like a touch that has an invincible effect,
Like a dream in a night – a dream without defect,
Like a presence that is immortally intact,
Love is like the wind;
Like a miracle, like a symphony from afar,
Like a song, like a melody that can never deter,
Like an endless life, like an angel’s avatar,
Love should be like the wind;
Like timelessness,
Like neverthelessness,
Like meekness,
Like fearlessness,
Love is like the wind...
Love should be as sure as the rising sun, and as pure as the wind,
Love should be as fond as the breaking of dawn, and as faithful as God,
Love is like the whisper of wind,
Love is like the power of the wind,
Love is the urge to move thenceforth when nothing else does,
And just like the wind, to overcome the urge of being as everything else does,
Love goes beyond doors, it pushes through the beyonds,
Love conquers, love soars, it rises above the beyonds,
Love imparts, love cares, it matches deeper than the beyonds,
Love rises just above the winds – just like the winds...
Love should caress our souls just like the wind,
Love should be available just like the wind...
Yeah, love like the wind...
Love should be like the wind...
Morris.
Sunday, April 15, 2012
When Character and Ramshackleness become Partners
It is raining outside. Yeah it is really raining. I don't like it when it rains and it falls on me. I don't like it when the rain(s) leave me wet and yearning for some good coffee. That forces me to eat popcorn with coffee... smart but really stupid and boring! It makes me feel bad. It makes me feel really bad. It makes me feel bad because it is normal to feel bad about things like rain all over you and people who are like that rain when they deal with others...
There are times and moments I am tempted to say, “Go to hell!” or “Go throw yourself into the sea!” or worse still, “Go buy yourself a ditch and throw yourself into it!” Those are just vented emotions. They are just a mixture of the rain and the wind or of the sun and blueness. They are just moments of not knowing what to do with pink emotions (read fake emotions) so as with an excuse I end up manufacturing words which I carefully spin in my mind but never make a home for them... It may be because I am a worse being if you have to start a fight with me... or against my thoughts... But everyone hates something about someone or something, I guess. I guess everyone feels the same at some point in their life. Like you wanna pluck out someone’s nose or ears, because such guys ‘just never get it!’
But I have a better excuse: though I may I hate not loving some things about some people, I guess it is normal... I guess it is normal because men are like thus – they can never fully satisfy your expectations...!! People have a way of letting you down. I’m not talking about relationships. Nah. I’m talking about people who think the world was created only for them and that it’s only them who should occupy it... Gheee! I’ve never felt this bad...!
There is one thing about life that I should talk about on this blog – you are not the main determinant of your destiny. Your destiny is a mixture of so many things (including God and fellow men). Your life is like a puppet that is manoeuvred by God, you and other people. (I stand to be corrected on this one.) You may be the main player in the game that is life, but that is not the end of it. That is not to mean that all that you decide and do is what is gonna be the ULTIMATE CAUSE for your destiny. You may play your cards well, yeah; but others may play those cards the other way round and you may also be playing them against God... and you may end up in a really deep ditch...
There is a proverb out there that says, “What goes round, comes round...” I want to show you what that means in many words;
1. Live your life knowing that other people around you also matter a lot.
2. Live your life in moderation > God + others are watching you;
a) You were born elsewhere and they were born somewhere else – your standards and observations on/in life will be somehow different. Always remember that!
b) You are educated. That is good. But don’t spill it all over our faces. How much education you have is none of our business; so deal with people just the way you find them... Anyway, education is just chasing away non-existing paranoia...
c) You have your style and swag and love it. Good! But don’t think we all like it, mun! Tukionekana washamba, just swallow it and move on...
3. Live life with others. My own saying on this one is, “Those desert people will bury you in the best sands if at all you happen to die where they dwell...” These humble people in society breathe and live just as you do. Your importance is unto yourself – don’t sell it to them because they have no chum to buy it. Remember that not all people you will meet will be beggars or ’quacks’ like those you have seen/met; there will always be a place where you will be the major quack and you will be treated just as you treat these ones...
4. Live life with God. “God will bury you, when no man is present...or make you live when no one is seeing..."
And that proverb up there makes sense to everyone. It should make sense to me and to you. It should make sense to the highest ranking servant or officer up to the least. It should make sense to the greatest and to the smallest. The law of good humanity depicts that you should be your brother's keeper and not his piece of ditchy beef! You should understand that character (the essence of being counted worthy by all according to your actions towards/directed to them) may not be built in one day. Character may not be built in one day but you can start form somewhere. Allow God to deal with it – allow Him to shape your character. Even if you were born within an environment where people despised/despise others, and count yourself as one who naturally looks down upon other people, life gives you a chance to change. Life gives you a chance to look deep into yourself and say, “I want to start valuing other people just as I value myself” ~~I guess that is what the Bible teaches as the law of LOVE ~~ It is then that you turn around and say, “I want to value the way these people/person do/does things without criticizing them.” Yeah, it is then that you tell yourself to shut up when the urge to call them stupid comes. It is then that you tell yourself that they are just men/human and you are just like them – with a difference of figuring out life differently...
Prologue
With the seeker is the zeal to find; with the source is the ability to supply,
A foolish man is he who thinks he can do both – be sought after and supply,
A wise man seeks and supplies, he honestly seeks and diligently supplies,
Such men are people of character – they understand that only God is by himself but for us all...
Sincerely,
Morris.
There are times and moments I am tempted to say, “Go to hell!” or “Go throw yourself into the sea!” or worse still, “Go buy yourself a ditch and throw yourself into it!” Those are just vented emotions. They are just a mixture of the rain and the wind or of the sun and blueness. They are just moments of not knowing what to do with pink emotions (read fake emotions) so as with an excuse I end up manufacturing words which I carefully spin in my mind but never make a home for them... It may be because I am a worse being if you have to start a fight with me... or against my thoughts... But everyone hates something about someone or something, I guess. I guess everyone feels the same at some point in their life. Like you wanna pluck out someone’s nose or ears, because such guys ‘just never get it!’
But I have a better excuse: though I may I hate not loving some things about some people, I guess it is normal... I guess it is normal because men are like thus – they can never fully satisfy your expectations...!! People have a way of letting you down. I’m not talking about relationships. Nah. I’m talking about people who think the world was created only for them and that it’s only them who should occupy it... Gheee! I’ve never felt this bad...!
There is one thing about life that I should talk about on this blog – you are not the main determinant of your destiny. Your destiny is a mixture of so many things (including God and fellow men). Your life is like a puppet that is manoeuvred by God, you and other people. (I stand to be corrected on this one.) You may be the main player in the game that is life, but that is not the end of it. That is not to mean that all that you decide and do is what is gonna be the ULTIMATE CAUSE for your destiny. You may play your cards well, yeah; but others may play those cards the other way round and you may also be playing them against God... and you may end up in a really deep ditch...
There is a proverb out there that says, “What goes round, comes round...” I want to show you what that means in many words;
1. Live your life knowing that other people around you also matter a lot.
2. Live your life in moderation > God + others are watching you;
a) You were born elsewhere and they were born somewhere else – your standards and observations on/in life will be somehow different. Always remember that!
b) You are educated. That is good. But don’t spill it all over our faces. How much education you have is none of our business; so deal with people just the way you find them... Anyway, education is just chasing away non-existing paranoia...
c) You have your style and swag and love it. Good! But don’t think we all like it, mun! Tukionekana washamba, just swallow it and move on...
3. Live life with others. My own saying on this one is, “Those desert people will bury you in the best sands if at all you happen to die where they dwell...” These humble people in society breathe and live just as you do. Your importance is unto yourself – don’t sell it to them because they have no chum to buy it. Remember that not all people you will meet will be beggars or ’quacks’ like those you have seen/met; there will always be a place where you will be the major quack and you will be treated just as you treat these ones...
4. Live life with God. “God will bury you, when no man is present...or make you live when no one is seeing..."
And that proverb up there makes sense to everyone. It should make sense to me and to you. It should make sense to the highest ranking servant or officer up to the least. It should make sense to the greatest and to the smallest. The law of good humanity depicts that you should be your brother's keeper and not his piece of ditchy beef! You should understand that character (the essence of being counted worthy by all according to your actions towards/directed to them) may not be built in one day. Character may not be built in one day but you can start form somewhere. Allow God to deal with it – allow Him to shape your character. Even if you were born within an environment where people despised/despise others, and count yourself as one who naturally looks down upon other people, life gives you a chance to change. Life gives you a chance to look deep into yourself and say, “I want to start valuing other people just as I value myself” ~~I guess that is what the Bible teaches as the law of LOVE ~~ It is then that you turn around and say, “I want to value the way these people/person do/does things without criticizing them.” Yeah, it is then that you tell yourself to shut up when the urge to call them stupid comes. It is then that you tell yourself that they are just men/human and you are just like them – with a difference of figuring out life differently...
Prologue
With the seeker is the zeal to find; with the source is the ability to supply,
A foolish man is he who thinks he can do both – be sought after and supply,
A wise man seeks and supplies, he honestly seeks and diligently supplies,
Such men are people of character – they understand that only God is by himself but for us all...
Sincerely,
Morris.
Sunday, April 8, 2012
The Scam that is Sin
Easter is already here.
One thing Easter does to many of us is to remind us of our faults. It reminds us of our unimagined wretchedness. Of our incomplete nature in the eyes of God’s infinite Holy stature. It haunts us with thoughts of our tattered righteousness – as bad as filthy rags (Isaiah et al). The queer moment of seeing an innocent man being crucified for ‘no reason at all’ is just overwhelming, you know. Have you ever taken an inside-the-mind picture of Christ’s final moments on this earth? The weird fact is that we all at some point of this life have sinned and fallen short of God’s glory (Romans 3:23).
I don’t glory in my own self. I have no time for that. I am always absent when they make a roll call of perfect people. I ain’t perfect, mun! I am not perfect. I have never been perfect. I don’t think I have... I always tell my friends (those guys know themselves) that not until Christ appears will I be made perfect. I don’t think you are perfect either. Whether it is in the view of what sin is or is the context of what righteousness sounds like, dude/dudette, you ain’t perfect! Period... So, you don’t have to look for perfect people – they don’t exist! I repeat, perfect people are a lie – THEY DON’T EXIST! My suggestion to you who thinks they DO exist is that you should try to look for those people who seek perfection without denying their imperfections, because those to me are normal people. Yes, they are very spiritual too!
The reason I’m saying this is because I somehow I’m more inspired when sin is mentioned or is crouching around because it makes me ask questions. Sin makes me ask stupid questions and most of the time I’m just the tag in between. This is in contrast with when I feel, ‘All is well.’ Because then I don’t really feel intimidated or inquisitive: why should a man worry when nothing is out of order and perfection reigns like my neighbour’s dog, huh? I have to say that sin, (and I don’t care if you like me mentioning it or not) is a paradox of some kind. Sin plays games no one really understands until they are face to face with the Grace of Christ. Sin is as awful before God as it is mysterious to us... But again sin makes us realize that without Christ, we ain’t nothing. Yeah, it makes me know that ‘from the ground did I come, and I am useless, unless I walk with the one who makes the miry clay beautiful...’
You see, a man (or woman – for those who think gender is a god of some kind) rarely understands just why he/she keeps making the same mistakes (that is a name we have recently baptized sin with in order to make it light and easy to go by) over and over again and always with ultimately record-breaking negative results when they struggle to get away from the cycle (what we call, “The Struggle to Break the Punitive Cycle”) ... And to add on to the bad mix, o how sin always seems to be so irresistibly sweet! Sin is irresistible. Very irresistible. The apostle Paul writes about it in Romans 7:15-19 by saying, "For I don’t understand what I am doing. For I do not do what I want – instead, I do what I hate. But if I do what I don’t want, I agree that the law is good. But now it is no longer me doing it, but sin that lives in me. For I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my flesh. For I want to do the good, but I cannot do it. For I do not do the good I want, but I do the very evil I do not want! Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer me doing it but sin that lives in me.
It is in the context of the above passage that we will now address human weakness and the ‘scam that is sin’.
Truly speaking, no one loves to sin. Yeah I think so. I think that no one loves indulging in fornication, or being a serial drunkard, or being a chain smoker... No one loves being looked at as the ‘the bad guy/chic’. No one loves being tagged a prostitute of homosexual or lesbian or husband-snatcher or gold-digger or something like that... No one loves being called immoral and corrupt, or greedy and unorganized. No on loves being sinful, unless they are demon possessed. Unless their consciences are dead (1 Timothy 4:2). Unless they have their own moral law – which in itself is a fad because there are no separate moral laws but just one that governs all humanity... So back to our thing with sin; we realize that somehow, sin just happens. Yeah, it just happens, huh? No, it doesn’t. It is just that it is very deceitful - it stealithly creeps in and you nver can overcome it on your own. I will give you an example - my own experience... and my struggle to overcome it on my own never really succeeded until I turned my life over...
I used to hate people who masturbated. I hated them and tagged them as guys without self control. Yeah, so I thought. They had/have no self control, right? I thought that they were extremely impossible. Intolerable, even. “How could someone do that to himself/herself?” I would ask myself. It was easy to question their indulgences because I had never climbed that boat to experience the agony they experienced when sin stared them in the face and they had no guts to tell it off. I thought I was this ‘cool’ guy who loved the Lord and as far as sin was concerned, unreachable or even, untouchable. This was until it came on me like a thud, voila! It swept me off my ‘steady’ conscience. Unimaginable. Very unimaginable. Those are the words I can use to describe what I felt then. “What is wrong with me?”, I would ask myself. Sin was crouching in slowly and I never realized until I was justifying it and the Lord’s Spirit was now on me telling me, “Come ooooout!” It was very loud. Very loud indeed. To make it all short, what happened was simple: I did not watch my limits as far as what I should or should not have done was concerned. I had allowed my mind to wander aimlessly when I missed someone I really cared for, I had resolved to call it ‘normal’. I had climbed the hill of ‘I am justified by Grace’ and that ‘I am eternally forgiven’ and had allowed myself to use my body wrongly. I just thought that somehow, God had created me that way and that I was ‘helpless’ as far as masturbation was concerned. I WAS WRONG. Very wrong. It was my weakness and the moment I realized it, I hated myself... I hated doing it... regret followed... pain engulfed me... unworthiness... futility... name them... Christ was far away. And I was here nailing him again! Tormenting Him again. That is what awakened me... Thank you Holy Spirit... He awakened me... He told me that that all was not lost so long as I choose not ot live in sin anymore... and to be clear on this, it had started tasting normal and sounding good. I was justifying it. I was not ready to repent. My prayer had turned away from, “Lord forgive me”, to “Lord you know my weakness, what can I do, please help me live with this, spare me the guilt”. Dead prayers! Sin had fooled me and I was held in its trap.
How did I come out? You may ask. Christ did it for me. Jesus loves me, you know. He turned me around when I started guarding my heart, my mind, my lips, my eyes... and here I am telling you that you may know what a scam sin really is...
Some points to note:
1. As far as sin is concerned, no one is untouchable and everyone is vulnerable; no one is invincible, but anyone can be trapped
2. Sin seeks to separate you from God and form people you fellowship with (because Satan knows that you won’t get someone to help you pray over your weaknesses and seeks to make you even weaker). Unless you deal with sin by repenting and being remorseful (like David in Psalm 51), dude/dudette, you are doomed!
3. Don’t boast of your perfectionism. You can fall and become the damnest thing we have ever met or known!
4. Be careful on how you use your eyes (what you see), your ears (what you listen to), your nose (what you smell into, hehe!), your lips (what you say), your body (what you indulge into), your mind (what you think at every moment of time) and your heart (what you desire); because these are the main avenues that will breed sin without you knowing – and sad enough it may take your life with it...
5. Learn to use self control – that is why Christ left us with the Holy Spirit as our enabler (our Helper)
Sincerely,
Morris.
One thing Easter does to many of us is to remind us of our faults. It reminds us of our unimagined wretchedness. Of our incomplete nature in the eyes of God’s infinite Holy stature. It haunts us with thoughts of our tattered righteousness – as bad as filthy rags (Isaiah et al). The queer moment of seeing an innocent man being crucified for ‘no reason at all’ is just overwhelming, you know. Have you ever taken an inside-the-mind picture of Christ’s final moments on this earth? The weird fact is that we all at some point of this life have sinned and fallen short of God’s glory (Romans 3:23).
I don’t glory in my own self. I have no time for that. I am always absent when they make a roll call of perfect people. I ain’t perfect, mun! I am not perfect. I have never been perfect. I don’t think I have... I always tell my friends (those guys know themselves) that not until Christ appears will I be made perfect. I don’t think you are perfect either. Whether it is in the view of what sin is or is the context of what righteousness sounds like, dude/dudette, you ain’t perfect! Period... So, you don’t have to look for perfect people – they don’t exist! I repeat, perfect people are a lie – THEY DON’T EXIST! My suggestion to you who thinks they DO exist is that you should try to look for those people who seek perfection without denying their imperfections, because those to me are normal people. Yes, they are very spiritual too!
The reason I’m saying this is because I somehow I’m more inspired when sin is mentioned or is crouching around because it makes me ask questions. Sin makes me ask stupid questions and most of the time I’m just the tag in between. This is in contrast with when I feel, ‘All is well.’ Because then I don’t really feel intimidated or inquisitive: why should a man worry when nothing is out of order and perfection reigns like my neighbour’s dog, huh? I have to say that sin, (and I don’t care if you like me mentioning it or not) is a paradox of some kind. Sin plays games no one really understands until they are face to face with the Grace of Christ. Sin is as awful before God as it is mysterious to us... But again sin makes us realize that without Christ, we ain’t nothing. Yeah, it makes me know that ‘from the ground did I come, and I am useless, unless I walk with the one who makes the miry clay beautiful...’
You see, a man (or woman – for those who think gender is a god of some kind) rarely understands just why he/she keeps making the same mistakes (that is a name we have recently baptized sin with in order to make it light and easy to go by) over and over again and always with ultimately record-breaking negative results when they struggle to get away from the cycle (what we call, “The Struggle to Break the Punitive Cycle”) ... And to add on to the bad mix, o how sin always seems to be so irresistibly sweet! Sin is irresistible. Very irresistible. The apostle Paul writes about it in Romans 7:15-19 by saying, "For I don’t understand what I am doing. For I do not do what I want – instead, I do what I hate. But if I do what I don’t want, I agree that the law is good. But now it is no longer me doing it, but sin that lives in me. For I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my flesh. For I want to do the good, but I cannot do it. For I do not do the good I want, but I do the very evil I do not want! Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer me doing it but sin that lives in me.
It is in the context of the above passage that we will now address human weakness and the ‘scam that is sin’.
Truly speaking, no one loves to sin. Yeah I think so. I think that no one loves indulging in fornication, or being a serial drunkard, or being a chain smoker... No one loves being looked at as the ‘the bad guy/chic’. No one loves being tagged a prostitute of homosexual or lesbian or husband-snatcher or gold-digger or something like that... No one loves being called immoral and corrupt, or greedy and unorganized. No on loves being sinful, unless they are demon possessed. Unless their consciences are dead (1 Timothy 4:2). Unless they have their own moral law – which in itself is a fad because there are no separate moral laws but just one that governs all humanity... So back to our thing with sin; we realize that somehow, sin just happens. Yeah, it just happens, huh? No, it doesn’t. It is just that it is very deceitful - it stealithly creeps in and you nver can overcome it on your own. I will give you an example - my own experience... and my struggle to overcome it on my own never really succeeded until I turned my life over...
I used to hate people who masturbated. I hated them and tagged them as guys without self control. Yeah, so I thought. They had/have no self control, right? I thought that they were extremely impossible. Intolerable, even. “How could someone do that to himself/herself?” I would ask myself. It was easy to question their indulgences because I had never climbed that boat to experience the agony they experienced when sin stared them in the face and they had no guts to tell it off. I thought I was this ‘cool’ guy who loved the Lord and as far as sin was concerned, unreachable or even, untouchable. This was until it came on me like a thud, voila! It swept me off my ‘steady’ conscience. Unimaginable. Very unimaginable. Those are the words I can use to describe what I felt then. “What is wrong with me?”, I would ask myself. Sin was crouching in slowly and I never realized until I was justifying it and the Lord’s Spirit was now on me telling me, “Come ooooout!” It was very loud. Very loud indeed. To make it all short, what happened was simple: I did not watch my limits as far as what I should or should not have done was concerned. I had allowed my mind to wander aimlessly when I missed someone I really cared for, I had resolved to call it ‘normal’. I had climbed the hill of ‘I am justified by Grace’ and that ‘I am eternally forgiven’ and had allowed myself to use my body wrongly. I just thought that somehow, God had created me that way and that I was ‘helpless’ as far as masturbation was concerned. I WAS WRONG. Very wrong. It was my weakness and the moment I realized it, I hated myself... I hated doing it... regret followed... pain engulfed me... unworthiness... futility... name them... Christ was far away. And I was here nailing him again! Tormenting Him again. That is what awakened me... Thank you Holy Spirit... He awakened me... He told me that that all was not lost so long as I choose not ot live in sin anymore... and to be clear on this, it had started tasting normal and sounding good. I was justifying it. I was not ready to repent. My prayer had turned away from, “Lord forgive me”, to “Lord you know my weakness, what can I do, please help me live with this, spare me the guilt”. Dead prayers! Sin had fooled me and I was held in its trap.
How did I come out? You may ask. Christ did it for me. Jesus loves me, you know. He turned me around when I started guarding my heart, my mind, my lips, my eyes... and here I am telling you that you may know what a scam sin really is...
Some points to note:
1. As far as sin is concerned, no one is untouchable and everyone is vulnerable; no one is invincible, but anyone can be trapped
2. Sin seeks to separate you from God and form people you fellowship with (because Satan knows that you won’t get someone to help you pray over your weaknesses and seeks to make you even weaker). Unless you deal with sin by repenting and being remorseful (like David in Psalm 51), dude/dudette, you are doomed!
3. Don’t boast of your perfectionism. You can fall and become the damnest thing we have ever met or known!
4. Be careful on how you use your eyes (what you see), your ears (what you listen to), your nose (what you smell into, hehe!), your lips (what you say), your body (what you indulge into), your mind (what you think at every moment of time) and your heart (what you desire); because these are the main avenues that will breed sin without you knowing – and sad enough it may take your life with it...
5. Learn to use self control – that is why Christ left us with the Holy Spirit as our enabler (our Helper)
Sincerely,
Morris.
Thursday, April 5, 2012
Casting Crowns - The Well (from Come to the Well album, 2011) – Lyrics & a Review
(Leave it all behind, leave it all behind) ×2
I have what you need but you keep on searchin'
I've done all the work but you keep on workin'
When you're runnin' on empty and you can't find the remedy
Just come to the well...
You can spend your whole life chasin' what's missin'
But that empty inside, it just ain't gonna listen
When nothin' can satisfy and the world leaves you high and dry
Just come to the well...
Chorus:
And all who thirst will thirst no more
And all who search will find what their souls long for
The world will try but it can never fill
So leave it all behind and come to the well...
So bring me your heart, no matter how broken
Just come as you are, when your last prayer is spoken
Just rest in my arms a while, you'll feel the change, my child
When you come to the well...
Repeat Chorus
Yeah, leave it all behind...
The world will try, but it can never fill, leave it all behind...
And now that you're full, of love beyond measure
Your joy's gonna flow, like a stream in the desert
Soon all the world will see that livin' water is found in me
'Cause you came to the well...
Repeat Chorus
(Leave it all behind, leave it all behind) ×2
The question in this season (Easter) is: Have you left it all behind? Have you come to drink from The Well? Have you drunk from the waters that never dry? Have you left behind all the trash, all the guilt, all the hatred, all the agony, all the unforgiveness? Have you left behind all the greed, all the lust, all the evil desires and the fears of the past behind you? Are they still haunting you or have you left them all behind?
It is only when we leave it all behind that we can be satisfied by the Well. Some choose to drink, yet they have not left it all behind. You only find what you were longing for when you learn to leave it all behind. Paul the apostle in Philippians 3:8 says, More than that, I now regard all things as liabilities compared to the far greater value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things – indeed, I regard them as dung! – that I may gain Christ, and in Philippians 3:13, Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself to have attained this. Instead I am single-minded: Forgetting the things that are behind and reaching out for the things that are ahead... Forget all that hurt you, all that brought/brings you down. Forget all the animosity... leave it all behind...
Come to the Well; come to drink, not to flaunter,
Come to the Well; come to be quenched, for your heart to grow fonder,
Come to the Well; come to be healed, to be redeemed,
Come to the Well; where Jesus overflows endlessly,
Just come to the Well...
Come to the Well; come at the feet of Jesus,
Come to the Well; come behold the Power in the cross,
Come to the Well; to behold Calvary all your days,
Come to the Well; just come to the Well...
Let those who drink give also to the thirsty,
That they too may find satisfaction at the Well,
As the rivers of living water overflow,
Let the Well quench us all...
Have great Easter festivities people of God,
May He make you drink more from the Well that you may be satisfied beyond measure.
God bless y'all,
Morris.
I have what you need but you keep on searchin'
I've done all the work but you keep on workin'
When you're runnin' on empty and you can't find the remedy
Just come to the well...
You can spend your whole life chasin' what's missin'
But that empty inside, it just ain't gonna listen
When nothin' can satisfy and the world leaves you high and dry
Just come to the well...
Chorus:
And all who thirst will thirst no more
And all who search will find what their souls long for
The world will try but it can never fill
So leave it all behind and come to the well...
So bring me your heart, no matter how broken
Just come as you are, when your last prayer is spoken
Just rest in my arms a while, you'll feel the change, my child
When you come to the well...
Repeat Chorus
Yeah, leave it all behind...
The world will try, but it can never fill, leave it all behind...
And now that you're full, of love beyond measure
Your joy's gonna flow, like a stream in the desert
Soon all the world will see that livin' water is found in me
'Cause you came to the well...
Repeat Chorus
(Leave it all behind, leave it all behind) ×2
The question in this season (Easter) is: Have you left it all behind? Have you come to drink from The Well? Have you drunk from the waters that never dry? Have you left behind all the trash, all the guilt, all the hatred, all the agony, all the unforgiveness? Have you left behind all the greed, all the lust, all the evil desires and the fears of the past behind you? Are they still haunting you or have you left them all behind?
It is only when we leave it all behind that we can be satisfied by the Well. Some choose to drink, yet they have not left it all behind. You only find what you were longing for when you learn to leave it all behind. Paul the apostle in Philippians 3:8 says, More than that, I now regard all things as liabilities compared to the far greater value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things – indeed, I regard them as dung! – that I may gain Christ, and in Philippians 3:13, Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself to have attained this. Instead I am single-minded: Forgetting the things that are behind and reaching out for the things that are ahead... Forget all that hurt you, all that brought/brings you down. Forget all the animosity... leave it all behind...
Come to the Well; come to drink, not to flaunter,
Come to the Well; come to be quenched, for your heart to grow fonder,
Come to the Well; come to be healed, to be redeemed,
Come to the Well; where Jesus overflows endlessly,
Just come to the Well...
Come to the Well; come at the feet of Jesus,
Come to the Well; come behold the Power in the cross,
Come to the Well; to behold Calvary all your days,
Come to the Well; just come to the Well...
Let those who drink give also to the thirsty,
That they too may find satisfaction at the Well,
As the rivers of living water overflow,
Let the Well quench us all...
Have great Easter festivities people of God,
May He make you drink more from the Well that you may be satisfied beyond measure.
God bless y'all,
Morris.
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Lovehatre!
I hate prisons. I really do hate prisons. I hate prisons because I hate the imagination of being a slave and most of your abilities limited behind walls. I don't love limitations. I don't love limitations that are predictable. Of late I found out that I hate prisons because I really do love freedom. Freedom is cool. Freedom is not like slavery. It is not like being dungeoned all day long. Nah. Freedom to me is an underground description of ‘I-have-all-the-food/things-I-need-and-I-feel-great-that-you-have-no-control-over-my-supply…’ Freedom is sunshine-like…
But before I talk too much, there are also two things I hate: braggarts and correctionists (don’t tafuta this in your dictionary because hautaipata.) Period!
Mr. Thoughts (that’s what I call my errand mind) feels like there are times when hatred and love should just be mixed into one word: lovehatre; pronounced – ‘lav-ata’. And the conditions for the use of such a word should be when the feelings directed towards the recipient (or in a contextual situation) have or contain both extremes. Then maybe the following ranting will make sense…
Mistakes are part of life. That is life, I think. Mistakes (or sin to the spiritual) are humanity’s weak points exposed. There is no perfect person (at least I think so). We also are always pointing out mistakes in others. We may all crave perfection at some point (or at all times) in life, but as we move on, we are reminded that perfection is a showroom of our weakness, an exposition our inadequateness, an announcement of our filthiness and a mockery of our serial inconsistency. It always runs away from us. And we are always zealously chasing after it! Even the ‘most’ perfect are just paradoxical hedonists… they later realize that their ways were or eventually are just as bad as those of the rest of the gang… Here in between is a mixture of love and hatred... Of love because we all admire perfection; but of hatred because 'who really loves to feel inadequate anyway?'
I have met people who use the phrase ‘I hate you’. Those are very strong words to use on someone. It is more weird when all those people you hate have done is not to bring every chaos to your life but just one. Hatred is weird. An you really need to have the best of reasons in order to cast that net of animosity on anyone. I have heard it used in the movies. In my favorite movies. I have heard it from those confused soaps (no gongo-gongo on this laadies, pleease), that define life through TV screens and imagination… I have heard it from places I had never expected and from lips so exclusive (and it is so, that I didn’t expect it from such zones, because I thought that thinking of its prevalence in such contexts was ridiculous, and not that it wasn’t possible). I have heard it from confused minds and from steadfast ones… That word just bites, you know. It is as ugly as an avocado-eating warthog. Ugly and unimaginable. Then “I love you” as a phrase is just the same… but on the other side of the line: beautiful and imaginable…! You too should have good reason(s) as to why you love someone... When you mix the two phrases in the commonness of a feeling, you end up with confusion as a result. Or maybe normalcy of some kind... There in between you realize a mixture of hatred and love. A ixture of extreme feelings.... Of hatred because we hate someone else showing us our mistakes and ridiculing our inner pride; and of love because we enjoy what we do and how we do it... really!
We don’t love to be corrected. Human beings love being right. It is an obsession of some kind. We love being the ones to order the ‘Terms and Conditions’. We hate being wrong. That is why we rarely say, ‘Yeah, I did it. It was my fault’, or ‘How can I become better, then?’ We love being our own bosses; and this makes me say that I don't think correction and acknowledgement of it were born of the same mother. They are just distant brothers, perhaps… because they always occupy the same place: one person's emotional world... and they are or borne of a stimuli (some reaction towards a known or an unknown happening...)
Bet me out that we can all testify to the fact no-one really loves to be pointed fingers at. No one. No one loves to take the blame in anything. Except Jesus. He was and still is the most exceptional human being. The normal us hate blemish tendencies. We love pointing fingers at others. We hate being pointed fingers at. We may have enjoyed the passion or the ‘joy’ together (as in the case of a pregnancy) but one party is always in denial. We may have enjoyed the genge stuff together (as in the case of beer, champagne, tequilas, wine and drugs) but one will always blame the others for indulgence or overindulgence or for death or for any catastrophic aftermath. We may have been a team, playing ‘cool’ games here and there, but one party always ends up being the carrier of the burden. That is human nature, I think. Bad human nature. We love the moments but hate the consequences… Love is always on one side, and hate on the other side - or are they just in the same place? I don't know...
Another way of seeing this, is when there are times you hate thinking that, a sense of unity between two rival chicken may just be due to the presence of a common enemy (the kite). And that those two chicken may not be real buddies. That they are just in some cave - in some prison - because their common enemy has/had threatened their existence; and also because of a common friendship borne out of wanting a hiding place... a hiding place that could easily be shared. They may be partners because of circumstance or friends with a distant common course. They may have fallen in love (I’m still talking of the chicken) because the moment allows them to. Therefore, there between you detect a mixture of love and hatred… Of love because they share and enjoy the hiding place together; and of hatred because once the enemy is gone, they will still fight over teritory...
Love and hatred are laws that scream, ‘Don’t do that!’ They are laws of beauty and flaw. They show us a two sided life that is just but one thing. They paint out a condition: It is because I don’t love it or I hate it… that I behave like I do behave... They imprison the soul and the mind. They make us vulnerable to stupidity. They make us overrule possibilities or undoubtedly accept them. They make us love and hate. They breed in us a momentous emotion - lovehatre! They compel us to love people at one moment because of one good thing they have done or they do; but possibility sticks on point to say that we can really hate the same people or person because of another thing we really desire to be blotted out of their lives or because of another thing they they have done/do. So ‘I hate you’ may just be a phrase meaning, ‘Kamon man, that really pisses me off’ but said in a bad language… It may be a way of saying, ‘I appreciate your correction, but you put it as if I am the devil himself, so I don’t care about what you are saying to me right now; and I was wrong to think you are the good person (or chicken) we hid in the cave with… (at least!!)’. 'I love you' can as well be just deceptive... a feeling of engrossment in superficial hypnosis... a wreckage of the soul that is softened to condone good feelings... to absorb within oneself feelings of pride in someone or something... But tables can still turn the other way round...
So I hate and love correctionists and braggarts. I hate them because they tell me the truth (which my human nature dislikes); and I love them because they are my friends anyway. This knowledge is what sheds light on what each human being possesses: an intrinsic and often extrinsic love-hate feeling that is real. Emotions play games on us. We sometimes call them ‘the fabricators of human behaviour’ if and when one is not careful to lead his/her life in the right way… I hate and love prisons… When I was still spankable by my father, I hated and loved him – all at the same time…
Lovehatre…
NB: Love and hatred as used in this passage are to be termed as feelings only and nothing else... and with no spiritual entity...
Morris.
But before I talk too much, there are also two things I hate: braggarts and correctionists (don’t tafuta this in your dictionary because hautaipata.) Period!
Mr. Thoughts (that’s what I call my errand mind) feels like there are times when hatred and love should just be mixed into one word: lovehatre; pronounced – ‘lav-ata’. And the conditions for the use of such a word should be when the feelings directed towards the recipient (or in a contextual situation) have or contain both extremes. Then maybe the following ranting will make sense…
Mistakes are part of life. That is life, I think. Mistakes (or sin to the spiritual) are humanity’s weak points exposed. There is no perfect person (at least I think so). We also are always pointing out mistakes in others. We may all crave perfection at some point (or at all times) in life, but as we move on, we are reminded that perfection is a showroom of our weakness, an exposition our inadequateness, an announcement of our filthiness and a mockery of our serial inconsistency. It always runs away from us. And we are always zealously chasing after it! Even the ‘most’ perfect are just paradoxical hedonists… they later realize that their ways were or eventually are just as bad as those of the rest of the gang… Here in between is a mixture of love and hatred... Of love because we all admire perfection; but of hatred because 'who really loves to feel inadequate anyway?'
I have met people who use the phrase ‘I hate you’. Those are very strong words to use on someone. It is more weird when all those people you hate have done is not to bring every chaos to your life but just one. Hatred is weird. An you really need to have the best of reasons in order to cast that net of animosity on anyone. I have heard it used in the movies. In my favorite movies. I have heard it from those confused soaps (no gongo-gongo on this laadies, pleease), that define life through TV screens and imagination… I have heard it from places I had never expected and from lips so exclusive (and it is so, that I didn’t expect it from such zones, because I thought that thinking of its prevalence in such contexts was ridiculous, and not that it wasn’t possible). I have heard it from confused minds and from steadfast ones… That word just bites, you know. It is as ugly as an avocado-eating warthog. Ugly and unimaginable. Then “I love you” as a phrase is just the same… but on the other side of the line: beautiful and imaginable…! You too should have good reason(s) as to why you love someone... When you mix the two phrases in the commonness of a feeling, you end up with confusion as a result. Or maybe normalcy of some kind... There in between you realize a mixture of hatred and love. A ixture of extreme feelings.... Of hatred because we hate someone else showing us our mistakes and ridiculing our inner pride; and of love because we enjoy what we do and how we do it... really!
We don’t love to be corrected. Human beings love being right. It is an obsession of some kind. We love being the ones to order the ‘Terms and Conditions’. We hate being wrong. That is why we rarely say, ‘Yeah, I did it. It was my fault’, or ‘How can I become better, then?’ We love being our own bosses; and this makes me say that I don't think correction and acknowledgement of it were born of the same mother. They are just distant brothers, perhaps… because they always occupy the same place: one person's emotional world... and they are or borne of a stimuli (some reaction towards a known or an unknown happening...)
Bet me out that we can all testify to the fact no-one really loves to be pointed fingers at. No one. No one loves to take the blame in anything. Except Jesus. He was and still is the most exceptional human being. The normal us hate blemish tendencies. We love pointing fingers at others. We hate being pointed fingers at. We may have enjoyed the passion or the ‘joy’ together (as in the case of a pregnancy) but one party is always in denial. We may have enjoyed the genge stuff together (as in the case of beer, champagne, tequilas, wine and drugs) but one will always blame the others for indulgence or overindulgence or for death or for any catastrophic aftermath. We may have been a team, playing ‘cool’ games here and there, but one party always ends up being the carrier of the burden. That is human nature, I think. Bad human nature. We love the moments but hate the consequences… Love is always on one side, and hate on the other side - or are they just in the same place? I don't know...
Another way of seeing this, is when there are times you hate thinking that, a sense of unity between two rival chicken may just be due to the presence of a common enemy (the kite). And that those two chicken may not be real buddies. That they are just in some cave - in some prison - because their common enemy has/had threatened their existence; and also because of a common friendship borne out of wanting a hiding place... a hiding place that could easily be shared. They may be partners because of circumstance or friends with a distant common course. They may have fallen in love (I’m still talking of the chicken) because the moment allows them to. Therefore, there between you detect a mixture of love and hatred… Of love because they share and enjoy the hiding place together; and of hatred because once the enemy is gone, they will still fight over teritory...
Love and hatred are laws that scream, ‘Don’t do that!’ They are laws of beauty and flaw. They show us a two sided life that is just but one thing. They paint out a condition: It is because I don’t love it or I hate it… that I behave like I do behave... They imprison the soul and the mind. They make us vulnerable to stupidity. They make us overrule possibilities or undoubtedly accept them. They make us love and hate. They breed in us a momentous emotion - lovehatre! They compel us to love people at one moment because of one good thing they have done or they do; but possibility sticks on point to say that we can really hate the same people or person because of another thing we really desire to be blotted out of their lives or because of another thing they they have done/do. So ‘I hate you’ may just be a phrase meaning, ‘Kamon man, that really pisses me off’ but said in a bad language… It may be a way of saying, ‘I appreciate your correction, but you put it as if I am the devil himself, so I don’t care about what you are saying to me right now; and I was wrong to think you are the good person (or chicken) we hid in the cave with… (at least!!)’. 'I love you' can as well be just deceptive... a feeling of engrossment in superficial hypnosis... a wreckage of the soul that is softened to condone good feelings... to absorb within oneself feelings of pride in someone or something... But tables can still turn the other way round...
So I hate and love correctionists and braggarts. I hate them because they tell me the truth (which my human nature dislikes); and I love them because they are my friends anyway. This knowledge is what sheds light on what each human being possesses: an intrinsic and often extrinsic love-hate feeling that is real. Emotions play games on us. We sometimes call them ‘the fabricators of human behaviour’ if and when one is not careful to lead his/her life in the right way… I hate and love prisons… When I was still spankable by my father, I hated and loved him – all at the same time…
Lovehatre…
NB: Love and hatred as used in this passage are to be termed as feelings only and nothing else... and with no spiritual entity...
Morris.
Thursday, March 15, 2012
Downtown Devils
She is innocent. She is herself. She is so innocent that her innocence screams all over the place. You can almost touch it. It yells. It yells the moment you see her. The innocence is a font of its own. She can be described well in terms of flowers and calm coast breezes. Her fragility is like the flowers of lilies by the riverside. It is like the breeze I desire in the noonday. Her fingers are small. And thin. And fragile. They are thick-thin. Just a little bit thin, but with tweaks of ladyishness. Her nails have no paint. Not that paint will spoil their natural feel, but that it will tarnish her statement. She has a statement - a statement I can see. A statement I can feel. You can see it in her eyes. In her eyes. Her eyes are tormenting because they remind you of a beauty you don’t often see on this side of the world. They are bright. They remind you of stars. They remind you of when you met Jesus. How He looked straight at you and revealed you. She is plain. You can see it in the way she moves her hands. The language of her body is not deceptive. She is sure of what she says and does. You can be sure of what she says. The movement of her lips reveal meekness. Mildness and meekness. I’m not falling in love. No. I already fell in love with another. I’m just describing her. Her dress says a lot about her mama and her moral code. It says that she only knows two languages: “Mama said” and “Teacher says”. Her weakness is impressive. You will admire her the moment you see her. Even tempted a lil’ bit. You can see her 'cheapness'. A cheapness you can’t buy. You somehow become scared of touching this innocent thing. She has ambitions and goals. She narrates them with passion. They are not all ‘potatoes-soup-and-rice’ thing. They are real stuff, dude/dudette...!
He is confident. He walks in a relaxed way. He doesn’t sway from side to side. He is so sure of himself that he makes you quiver a lil’ bit. He is not that masculine but is promising. He is a lot more than what I commonly see. Perfect. Composed. Well intended. Uncommon. I love uniqueness. And he has it. He is still ‘green’, but not foolish. He is a daddish kind-a guy. He has a heart of a rock. He ain’t a fad. He is real. He is not a freak. Girls can be sure that he keeps his word. He still apologizes when he does wrong. He knows how to control his temper. I tested it. I broke his best gems and voila! He just looked at me, felt like yelling, but later smiled. Cool. I don’t find that everywhere. I can assure you of that. He is principled. Takes good care of himself. Doesn’t move around too much. Dude is cool. Damn coooool. Did I mention he goes to church quite often? Even prays in private and lifts up his hands in Worship? Mhhhhhh...
Just until...
Downtown mania strikes. Until bleakness jumps over the fence and offers a ride. And mummy+teacher-so-and-so is forgotten and becomes trash material. Damped in the bin. Kanjo stuff! Until the rules are changed and tables go upside down. Until I don’t know nothing about anyone anymore. Until words are lost and tempo and pitch are out of control. Until the music loses life and rolls into emptiness. I can’t dance anymore. I can’t dance. I can’t yell to no tune. Life becomes a bad song. A bad core. Volcanoes are better. Life strikes in downtownism like a bug. Dirty, infectious and itchy! Music is sweet when you can get its next chord, but when it flops, it becomes tasteless. It edges into blankness. Even darkness. And dark music is as bad as that porridge I used to drink somewhere. You drink it but without liking...
I don’t know what happened. Or what happens. I don’t know. But I’m trying to. I don’t know what crawls into the innocence and surety. I don’t know. Really. Those fingers just change; and the perfection fades. The fragility is stolen and bitterness engraves a once pure soul. Things do happen, I say. I blame it on devils. Yeah, they should be devils. Downtown devils. They should be devils that creep stealthily in the night seeking for innocent blood. They should be opportunistic devils that grab and transform innocence into a stupor of madness. They should be working underground in some pinky labs. They should be vampires too – which bite and transform... Grrrrrrrr! They should be some ‘Team-Jacob’ or ‘Team-Edward’ kind-of creatures... that silently but steadily haunt these ‘Bellas’ until all they see is “I need to be like Edward”. Grrrrrrr! Again! Downtown devils. I get a paleness of the mind here. One smart creature, normal and thriving gets changed overnight with a flip of the page. I see Bebo Norman’s song ‘A Page Is Turned’ in a different wild perspective here... I don’t know... I think we should kill the devils. Why should they keep tormenting our lives’ layouts? Why should they keep diminishing our hopes and ambitions and keep stealing us? Why should they keep enslaving us? Afterwhile we may dance again to the right tunes... to the tunes of life made in the stars and hanging in beauty, over glory... And watch the flowers blossom... And watch the rocks shine with polishing and not afraid of the sun anymore... And drink the wine of purity and enjoy the moments of surety... I think we should kill the devils... or render them useless...!
So remember...
The world never turns around overnight without us knowing,
Nor do the stars dance in the night when we can’t know,
Life never whizzes songs or tunes we can’t comprehend,
Nor does it offer choices we can’t deal with;
There is always an escape avenue or an entrance to every place in life,
Whence you entered, you can come out,
Whence you sang and danced, you can mourn,
The road is two way – there is going, and coming forth,
Only the going comes forth; and only the coming forth causes meaning...
Sincerely,
Morris.
He is confident. He walks in a relaxed way. He doesn’t sway from side to side. He is so sure of himself that he makes you quiver a lil’ bit. He is not that masculine but is promising. He is a lot more than what I commonly see. Perfect. Composed. Well intended. Uncommon. I love uniqueness. And he has it. He is still ‘green’, but not foolish. He is a daddish kind-a guy. He has a heart of a rock. He ain’t a fad. He is real. He is not a freak. Girls can be sure that he keeps his word. He still apologizes when he does wrong. He knows how to control his temper. I tested it. I broke his best gems and voila! He just looked at me, felt like yelling, but later smiled. Cool. I don’t find that everywhere. I can assure you of that. He is principled. Takes good care of himself. Doesn’t move around too much. Dude is cool. Damn coooool. Did I mention he goes to church quite often? Even prays in private and lifts up his hands in Worship? Mhhhhhh...
Just until...
Downtown mania strikes. Until bleakness jumps over the fence and offers a ride. And mummy+teacher-so-and-so is forgotten and becomes trash material. Damped in the bin. Kanjo stuff! Until the rules are changed and tables go upside down. Until I don’t know nothing about anyone anymore. Until words are lost and tempo and pitch are out of control. Until the music loses life and rolls into emptiness. I can’t dance anymore. I can’t dance. I can’t yell to no tune. Life becomes a bad song. A bad core. Volcanoes are better. Life strikes in downtownism like a bug. Dirty, infectious and itchy! Music is sweet when you can get its next chord, but when it flops, it becomes tasteless. It edges into blankness. Even darkness. And dark music is as bad as that porridge I used to drink somewhere. You drink it but without liking...
I don’t know what happened. Or what happens. I don’t know. But I’m trying to. I don’t know what crawls into the innocence and surety. I don’t know. Really. Those fingers just change; and the perfection fades. The fragility is stolen and bitterness engraves a once pure soul. Things do happen, I say. I blame it on devils. Yeah, they should be devils. Downtown devils. They should be devils that creep stealthily in the night seeking for innocent blood. They should be opportunistic devils that grab and transform innocence into a stupor of madness. They should be working underground in some pinky labs. They should be vampires too – which bite and transform... Grrrrrrrr! They should be some ‘Team-Jacob’ or ‘Team-Edward’ kind-of creatures... that silently but steadily haunt these ‘Bellas’ until all they see is “I need to be like Edward”. Grrrrrrr! Again! Downtown devils. I get a paleness of the mind here. One smart creature, normal and thriving gets changed overnight with a flip of the page. I see Bebo Norman’s song ‘A Page Is Turned’ in a different wild perspective here... I don’t know... I think we should kill the devils. Why should they keep tormenting our lives’ layouts? Why should they keep diminishing our hopes and ambitions and keep stealing us? Why should they keep enslaving us? Afterwhile we may dance again to the right tunes... to the tunes of life made in the stars and hanging in beauty, over glory... And watch the flowers blossom... And watch the rocks shine with polishing and not afraid of the sun anymore... And drink the wine of purity and enjoy the moments of surety... I think we should kill the devils... or render them useless...!
So remember...
The world never turns around overnight without us knowing,
Nor do the stars dance in the night when we can’t know,
Life never whizzes songs or tunes we can’t comprehend,
Nor does it offer choices we can’t deal with;
There is always an escape avenue or an entrance to every place in life,
Whence you entered, you can come out,
Whence you sang and danced, you can mourn,
The road is two way – there is going, and coming forth,
Only the going comes forth; and only the coming forth causes meaning...
Sincerely,
Morris.
Sunday, March 11, 2012
Of Love and the Hitherto Furore
Are you dreaming of falling in love? Don’t.
Maybe I’ll say just fall in love a lil’ bit. Just a lil’ bit, yeah…
‘Ve been walking around town. Freedom of the eye reigns you know. Downtown has wonders. Downtown may not be as interesting and mysterious as Ghetto but it has its own unique stories. It has its own wonders. Abnormal wonders. Downtown belongs (or rather belonged) to the styled in society. To people with swag… I don’t think I ever longed going there when I was still green. Green? Mama advised me that it was not the best thing, She told me it is an avaricious animal. A black one to be exact. And I believed her. You believed/believe yours didn’t you? Or did that ‘Mama’s-got-the-best-swag-in-town’ end with my generation? I don’t know…
Shame on me if you misquote me on this one. Or if you decide to make me a ‘discuss-able’ topic for your wall post. You may decide to make me the subject of those kinds of aimless discussions on Facebook that will always begin with, ‘I wonder…’ or ‘I am sick of…’ or ‘Why is…’. Yeah. Me thinks it is there that Facebook just fails in the game of social media. Those wall posts are as damn predictable as they are sick! #ImJustSaying…
But maybe love will save you from your agony. Maybe. Maybe love will swallow up your insecurities. Maybe it will become your salvation from that bug of low self-esteem. It may just boost you a lil’ bit. Yeah. Maybe. It is drama. Finding it involves drama. It just never seems to be found. Quote me on this one too… grrrrrrr! You may decide to walk downtown advertising yourself as marketable; the smoke of love coming out of your nostrils and the brightness in your eyes failing your intentions. You may decide to seek for some TLC. Internet has some TLC too! And internet is just part of Downtown, if you didn’t know. Maybe you picked on it. I don’t know. It has too many pot holes though… Just be ready for them. Some are so big that they are fatal…!
Scenario #1: Bag in one hand, phone in the other. Supras on your heels, smarted up in your pocks… Gladiators or stilettos down under, styled-up on your head. Picks in the bag, show in the mind. Drama like karma stealing up your ambers. Light in the eye, dots on the cheek. Binge in your heart, starvation down the soul-line. Marked for any extremes you are. Love tastes like pork. Some love it. Some hate it. Both two extremes. Love is drama. Love isn’t your mama. Love does not know how to take care of stupid people. It only knows how to take care of the wise. Love is not blind. If you are seeking to fall in love blindly, that ain’t it! That is voodoo! You may be Haitian… You may need the services of a psychiatrist…
So you are out in your dream world. Raging thoughts. Tweaks of holding smart phone in one hand, gum in the cheek, planning nothing, waiting to be planned for. Plainness well described. Plan-dumb. Strummed. Strumming too. Music in headphones. Gaaa-gaaa. Stolen but still free. Free in an enslavement portfolio.
You won’t find love. Not in that place. Not from those match-making sites. You are endearing ghosts. You are crying foul for yourself. You are chasing ghosts. Don’t think of love right there… Don’t….
Scenario #2: Good looking. Plain good. Humble. Standardised. Principled. But love’s missing. Mmmmmh. Very lonely. Needs TLC too. But in uncompromised hollas… Good point. Holds phone. Wants to call someone. Feels sweaty. Can see it on the palm. Says no. Scrolls down the phone book. Not to get a number but to thief thoughts away. Calls friend instead. Long-forgotten friend. Friend wonders. But feels good about the call. Ditch. Dark pit. Yaaak, why is this one sooo happy and I need someone’s shoulder who will get into my shoes and cry with me? Grrrrr! Kills a bug with a dooosh. Bug ain’t dying. Something running mad deep within. *Asks self*: Am I desperate? Someone out there feeling how I feel?... Falls on bed. Masturbation lacks behind. A shadow of sinfulness. Bad idea. Decides to get out. Closes door. Says bye friend next room: *I’ll be back in a few…* Coldness increases. Meets trees dancing happily in the wind. Feels agitated. Why can’t a tree feel me? Hug me, even? *My answer*: ‘It ain’t human. Pets won’t help either.’ Lacking love is painful, huh? It is like a fire consuming within. A fire we can’t see. A fire that keeps on recurring… Won’t find it their either. Love is slippery. It can’t just be found when you are so much dreaming of it. Can’t be found even when you scream it out… Blank page too…
Why? Why can’t love meet you? Why can’t it even greet you and just pass by? Why can’t it be found, huh? We think of it too much. We seek for it in the wrong places. @Mavuno.org says we have not decided to nurture it within so that we may give it forth. Why do we expect people to meet us and love us in their most perfect forms while we ain’t good enough for them? Excuses. We give excuses. We give excuses as to why men/women are bad. Mmmmmh. That sounds reasonable. But we too are me and women ain’t we? Love plays around us all the time I guess, but we keep on looking for it elsewhere. It dances in us, but we don’t want to recognise or appreciate it. We don’t want to dance with it. We don’t want to nurture it in the right way… So we always fail to get it… It slips away… And it may never be found if we keep screaming in this furore…
Maybe I’ll say just fall in love a lil’ bit. Just a lil’ bit, yeah…
‘Ve been walking around town. Freedom of the eye reigns you know. Downtown has wonders. Downtown may not be as interesting and mysterious as Ghetto but it has its own unique stories. It has its own wonders. Abnormal wonders. Downtown belongs (or rather belonged) to the styled in society. To people with swag… I don’t think I ever longed going there when I was still green. Green? Mama advised me that it was not the best thing, She told me it is an avaricious animal. A black one to be exact. And I believed her. You believed/believe yours didn’t you? Or did that ‘Mama’s-got-the-best-swag-in-town’ end with my generation? I don’t know…
Shame on me if you misquote me on this one. Or if you decide to make me a ‘discuss-able’ topic for your wall post. You may decide to make me the subject of those kinds of aimless discussions on Facebook that will always begin with, ‘I wonder…’ or ‘I am sick of…’ or ‘Why is…’. Yeah. Me thinks it is there that Facebook just fails in the game of social media. Those wall posts are as damn predictable as they are sick! #ImJustSaying…
But maybe love will save you from your agony. Maybe. Maybe love will swallow up your insecurities. Maybe it will become your salvation from that bug of low self-esteem. It may just boost you a lil’ bit. Yeah. Maybe. It is drama. Finding it involves drama. It just never seems to be found. Quote me on this one too… grrrrrrr! You may decide to walk downtown advertising yourself as marketable; the smoke of love coming out of your nostrils and the brightness in your eyes failing your intentions. You may decide to seek for some TLC. Internet has some TLC too! And internet is just part of Downtown, if you didn’t know. Maybe you picked on it. I don’t know. It has too many pot holes though… Just be ready for them. Some are so big that they are fatal…!
Scenario #1: Bag in one hand, phone in the other. Supras on your heels, smarted up in your pocks… Gladiators or stilettos down under, styled-up on your head. Picks in the bag, show in the mind. Drama like karma stealing up your ambers. Light in the eye, dots on the cheek. Binge in your heart, starvation down the soul-line. Marked for any extremes you are. Love tastes like pork. Some love it. Some hate it. Both two extremes. Love is drama. Love isn’t your mama. Love does not know how to take care of stupid people. It only knows how to take care of the wise. Love is not blind. If you are seeking to fall in love blindly, that ain’t it! That is voodoo! You may be Haitian… You may need the services of a psychiatrist…
So you are out in your dream world. Raging thoughts. Tweaks of holding smart phone in one hand, gum in the cheek, planning nothing, waiting to be planned for. Plainness well described. Plan-dumb. Strummed. Strumming too. Music in headphones. Gaaa-gaaa. Stolen but still free. Free in an enslavement portfolio.
You won’t find love. Not in that place. Not from those match-making sites. You are endearing ghosts. You are crying foul for yourself. You are chasing ghosts. Don’t think of love right there… Don’t….
Scenario #2: Good looking. Plain good. Humble. Standardised. Principled. But love’s missing. Mmmmmh. Very lonely. Needs TLC too. But in uncompromised hollas… Good point. Holds phone. Wants to call someone. Feels sweaty. Can see it on the palm. Says no. Scrolls down the phone book. Not to get a number but to thief thoughts away. Calls friend instead. Long-forgotten friend. Friend wonders. But feels good about the call. Ditch. Dark pit. Yaaak, why is this one sooo happy and I need someone’s shoulder who will get into my shoes and cry with me? Grrrrr! Kills a bug with a dooosh. Bug ain’t dying. Something running mad deep within. *Asks self*: Am I desperate? Someone out there feeling how I feel?... Falls on bed. Masturbation lacks behind. A shadow of sinfulness. Bad idea. Decides to get out. Closes door. Says bye friend next room: *I’ll be back in a few…* Coldness increases. Meets trees dancing happily in the wind. Feels agitated. Why can’t a tree feel me? Hug me, even? *My answer*: ‘It ain’t human. Pets won’t help either.’ Lacking love is painful, huh? It is like a fire consuming within. A fire we can’t see. A fire that keeps on recurring… Won’t find it their either. Love is slippery. It can’t just be found when you are so much dreaming of it. Can’t be found even when you scream it out… Blank page too…
Why? Why can’t love meet you? Why can’t it even greet you and just pass by? Why can’t it be found, huh? We think of it too much. We seek for it in the wrong places. @Mavuno.org says we have not decided to nurture it within so that we may give it forth. Why do we expect people to meet us and love us in their most perfect forms while we ain’t good enough for them? Excuses. We give excuses. We give excuses as to why men/women are bad. Mmmmmh. That sounds reasonable. But we too are me and women ain’t we? Love plays around us all the time I guess, but we keep on looking for it elsewhere. It dances in us, but we don’t want to recognise or appreciate it. We don’t want to dance with it. We don’t want to nurture it in the right way… So we always fail to get it… It slips away… And it may never be found if we keep screaming in this furore…
Friday, March 2, 2012
Expectations, Patience and Anxiety
There is nothing more meaningless than expecting nothing; and there is nothing as futile to the soul as expectations that have gone wrong. The former tells that you are a purposeless fool, while the latter insists that you became too wise that your wisdom ate you up.
There is a way life gets hold of us, putting us in dark places of uncertainty, in irrelevant corners where we don’t see the whole. Where we see things half way – half-empty-glass-syndrome... Where the world is never seen as it should be seen. Somehow we always want to get out fast and yell out to the whole world that we are ‘sick and tired of being sick and tired’; or the more spiritual kind of u – staging a fight, calling the Creator and asking Him stupid questions; telling him things. Telling Him stupid things. Judging Him. Feeling baaaaad. Wondering why solutions we’ve been waiting for, for such a long time are not forthcoming. We get held up in a wonder world that may consume us whole and drain us into apostasy or into blame games of no substantial entities.
There is no time when a human being is prone to stupidity and arrogance than when they are expecting things that never appear...things that move in winds and ashes... Then is when all wisdom may vanish and the heaviness of anxiety takes charge to throw us deep down a pit of regret...
And the sad side of things is that patience-without-murmuring has never been taught in class. No one ever teaches that to any one! Patience and waiting are lessons that life teaches someone – your or my mama won’t teach us that! And even if you may want to teach me, you won’t help me apply it. You may want to blame it on our upbringing or on our personalities, or on our different encounters and experiences from birth; or on our parents, or friends... but no one is to be blamed when we all have sounds of ignited agony in our minds and hearts when things are not coming forth as we expected. No-one. No one is to blame for our wrong choices fuelled by impatience. No one is to blame for our avaricious acts, for our uncalculated steps due to haste. No-one. No one is to blame for our fornication, our immoral deeds, our bribery acts, our visionless ways due to lacking the guts to wait ‘just a little bit more’.
Because we are all different, and diversity should be embraced rather than condemned, we should never stop to learn the few virtues that life wants to teach us. If we by chance meet a need for patience staring at us, we should greet it and learn from it. Life is all about acquiring knowledge so that next time ‘you’re a bit smarter than before’.
We should not stop expecting things to happen. We should not stop to wait for stuff to come up... How can life be interesting without longing for a miracle, or a gift, or a promise to be fulfilled? All we should do is to learn from every one of the situations we have on our way, embrace God more, how to run the game of expectancy without falling into the pit of self denial or low self-esteem, or blaming others or God. Expectations may be painful, but what comes out and how we deal with it is what matters most. God rewards us at the point of His coming and depending on how He finds us; although when we are almost giving up is when He appears (almost always) just to show us that it is in our weaknesses He reveals himself...
Learn how to expect today!
Quote: God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks to us in our conscience, but shouts in our pain; it is His megaphone to arouse a deaf world! – C. S. Lewis.
Sincerely, Morris.
There is a way life gets hold of us, putting us in dark places of uncertainty, in irrelevant corners where we don’t see the whole. Where we see things half way – half-empty-glass-syndrome... Where the world is never seen as it should be seen. Somehow we always want to get out fast and yell out to the whole world that we are ‘sick and tired of being sick and tired’; or the more spiritual kind of u – staging a fight, calling the Creator and asking Him stupid questions; telling him things. Telling Him stupid things. Judging Him. Feeling baaaaad. Wondering why solutions we’ve been waiting for, for such a long time are not forthcoming. We get held up in a wonder world that may consume us whole and drain us into apostasy or into blame games of no substantial entities.
There is no time when a human being is prone to stupidity and arrogance than when they are expecting things that never appear...things that move in winds and ashes... Then is when all wisdom may vanish and the heaviness of anxiety takes charge to throw us deep down a pit of regret...
And the sad side of things is that patience-without-murmuring has never been taught in class. No one ever teaches that to any one! Patience and waiting are lessons that life teaches someone – your or my mama won’t teach us that! And even if you may want to teach me, you won’t help me apply it. You may want to blame it on our upbringing or on our personalities, or on our different encounters and experiences from birth; or on our parents, or friends... but no one is to be blamed when we all have sounds of ignited agony in our minds and hearts when things are not coming forth as we expected. No-one. No one is to blame for our wrong choices fuelled by impatience. No one is to blame for our avaricious acts, for our uncalculated steps due to haste. No-one. No one is to blame for our fornication, our immoral deeds, our bribery acts, our visionless ways due to lacking the guts to wait ‘just a little bit more’.
Because we are all different, and diversity should be embraced rather than condemned, we should never stop to learn the few virtues that life wants to teach us. If we by chance meet a need for patience staring at us, we should greet it and learn from it. Life is all about acquiring knowledge so that next time ‘you’re a bit smarter than before’.
We should not stop expecting things to happen. We should not stop to wait for stuff to come up... How can life be interesting without longing for a miracle, or a gift, or a promise to be fulfilled? All we should do is to learn from every one of the situations we have on our way, embrace God more, how to run the game of expectancy without falling into the pit of self denial or low self-esteem, or blaming others or God. Expectations may be painful, but what comes out and how we deal with it is what matters most. God rewards us at the point of His coming and depending on how He finds us; although when we are almost giving up is when He appears (almost always) just to show us that it is in our weaknesses He reveals himself...
Learn how to expect today!
Quote: God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks to us in our conscience, but shouts in our pain; it is His megaphone to arouse a deaf world! – C. S. Lewis.
Sincerely, Morris.
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